


'Cause Angels Don't Come Home

by vagrantBreath



Series: Shattered [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Brainwashing, Broken Bones, Disembowelment, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Power Imbalance, Psychological Torture, Rape/Non-con Elements, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-11-12
Packaged: 2018-08-22 02:39:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 33,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8269511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vagrantBreath/pseuds/vagrantBreath
Summary: Keith gets caught.And Zarkon takes a special interest in him.





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, let's get this party started. This will be broken down into three parts: First chapters will be Part 1, which is all the stuff leading up to the first scene in chapter 1. An interlude chapter. And start the Part 2 chapters, what happens after.
> 
> Enjoy.

An explosion shook Keith awake.

He was on his feet in an instant, hand wrapped around his bayard (finally, his bayard). Nothing could change the instinct to get up and fight as soon as one presented itself. There were enemies on board, thus, he should go fight them.

But he could feel the slight ache in his bones, still healing. The faint run of pain up his backside, caught on the edge of humiliation he should have let go by now. He should stay where he was. If he left the room now, he would be a liability. The bayard ached in his hands as he gripped it hard. He wanted to go out there, to fight- but it would be death to do so.

Or worse. The thought seized him, his heart pounding hard in his chest. Whoever it was could take him again. And this time it would be worse- no. He had to trust everything was okay. He was taken care of here. After all that had happened, after what _they_ had done, he was fine.

He was taken care of. He was safe here.

Keith held his bayard tightly, waiting. If anyone came in, he’d kill them. But he wasn’t going to get caught again. Not after the last time. He survived last time. This time, he wasn’t going to be caught unaware.

He could hear commotion from outside. The weight of his bayard turning into the sword was comforting as he listened, tensing. Silence now, but it was heavy. Waiting.

Footsteps.

He tensed.

Then the door opened, and he sprang, snarling.

”Whoa!” His sword clashed with a particle shield, his eyes meeting a grim, familiar face. Another snarl escaped his throat at the sight, anger rising in him as he back away slightly and readied his sword. The figure before him raised his rifle...

And lowered it, gaping. “Keith?”

How dare Lance looked surprised. After...

”Keith, oh my God... you’re... it’s me, Keith! Lance, your buddy! Er, rival, whatever!”

”I know who the fuck you are,” he said, his voice low and angry. How dare he act like that now.

”Oh. Good! Then, uh... point the sharp object away from me? It’s kinda creeping me out.”

Keith felt his upper lip rise in a snarl, his eyes closing for a brief moment in anger-

* * *

_The past_

-and he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lance,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. “Are you fucking serious?”

”Yeah!” Lance grinned at him. “You can’t tell me you haven’t thought of it. Pidge, back me up.”

”You do know I’m gay, right?” Keith asked, his voice testy. “So what you said doesn’t pertain to me.”

”Then apply it to hot guys. It works both ways, trust me. I’ve tested it. But come on.”

Keith just stood up, walking away from the dinner table. Lance’s crude talk about sex had gotten on his last nerve. And by the way Pidge got up as well, it looked like she was tired of it too. He slowed his steps enough to let her catch up to him as they left, words bubbling up in his chest.

”Doesn’t he ever get tired of that shit?” Pidge finally asked as they walked, shoving her hands in her pockets. “I mean, I get it. Bored, own entertainment, yadda yadda. But he’s got to have new material to work with here. Something other than how to gauge how good a person would be in the bedroom.” Pidge muttered something under her breath, shaking her head.

”Think if he finally sucked Shiro’s dick he’d settle down?” Keith asked her, making her laugh hard.

”He’d at least stop being so sexually frustrated!” She shook her head. “But alas. He might not be lying about being bi anymore, but he’s definitely denying that crush on Shiro.”

”People from _Earth_ can see that crush. _I_ can see that crush.”

”We never said Lance was subtle.”

Keith sighed. That was true. “If he doesn’t get off his ass, you’ll turn eighteen and have a chance at Shiro.”

Pidge sighed wistfully. “If only. I don’t think Shiro sees any of us as more than teammates, though. So we’re just going to have to crush on Shiro from afar.”

”Hey, none of you are my type. Leave me out of this.”

Pidge laughed. “Yeah, I can see why.” They stopped in front of her room and she turned to him. “Wanna come in and continue gossiping like old ladies over a movie?”

Keith shook his head. “I’d rather go down to the training room. Thanks for the offer.”

”No problem. Us antisocial assholes have to stick together.”

That made Keith laugh, clasping her shoulder. “I’ll see you later.”

She waved as he left. His step was a little lighter as he walked back to his room to change and grab his bayard, then down to the training room, his talk with Pidge having done some good. He no longer felt like wanting to strangle Lance for his stupidity. Which, if he acted on it, only brought down a “this is wrong and bad for Voltron” speech from Shiro.

It wasn’t like he wanted to actually hurt him... just let him know he needed to shut the fuck up. Lance wasn’t really a bad guy, and he was a good teammate. He just needed to shut up.

Keith took a deep breath as he entered the training room, his bayard a comforting weight in his hand. Enough of that. He needed to relax, and beating up a few droids would do that.

”Start simulation,” he called out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was going to be up earlier.
> 
> Then I watched [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsYGfzj2AM0) and couldn't stop watching it over and over. (Spoilers for volumes 1-3 of RWBY)
> 
> I may have been influenced by it.

Maybe he overdid it a little bit. Keith winced as he held his side, feeling his side twing with pain with each pant.

Well. He wouldn’t get better unless he pushed himself a little bit. He stretched, wincing again. Maybe time for a shower. He grabbed his water, taking a sip as he left. It hadn’t be a bad training session... good, even. He just- it just felt like he was plateauing. That he couldn’t get any better from here.

And he couldn’t afford that. They _had_ to get better. The universe relied on them.

They had to do it. He had to do this.

He took another sip, entering his room, the door sliding closed behind him. Clothes hit the floor as he started for the bathroom, intent on a shower. It wasn’t until hot water was flowing over his shoulders that he started to relax, letting out a long breath.

No need to worry about it in here. Just relax. The heat seeped into him, a little hint of fire. It felt soothing as the water washed off the grime and sweat. Keith started to clean up, reaching up to dig soapy fingers into his shoulder, massaging a knot there. Finally, he had enough of water and finished rinsing off, shutting it off and dried off, knotting the towel around his waist as he left the bathroom.

He went to pick up his dirty workout clothes, dropping them into the laundry chute and picking out his usual clothes. As he pulled on his gloves, he paused.

Then shook his head. He didn’t know what that feeling he just had was. It... was a feeling.

Gloves safely on, he left for food, the memory of the feeling in the back of his head.

* * *

”I’ll just be in,” Keith said sarcastically, pulling his bayard out as he ran. “Just in and out. What the hell, Lance.”

”Yell at me later, save my ass now!”

”Keith, you’re the only one nearby,” Shiro said over the com link. “Pidge and I are with the prisoners.”

”Got it.”

”Uh, ass saving? There’s a lot of guys here!”

”You have a gun! Use it!”

”I am using it! Doesn’t change the fact there’s a lot of guys!”

Keith sighed, turning a corner. Lance was probably not kidding. When it came to battles, he didn’t mess around. They all knew how important they were.

And yep, that was a lot of guys.

”How the hell did you manage to get this many on your ass, Lance?”

”Don’t ask, just save!”

There really wasn’t anything else he could say. Instead, he raised his bayard, the sword a welcome weight as he rushed forward. His sword slammed into a droid, slicing through it with ease. From there, it was an easy sway and run of battle: his sword a deadly arc in the air as he moved. But something made him stop, back away.

”Lance!”

A bad feeling.

And then an explosion.

* * *

”Well, that was a waste.”

Keith swam back to consciousness at the angry growl. It was... he groaned, slitting his eyes open. The cracked covering of his helmet met him as the rest of the room resolved into shapes.

Two figures had their backs to him, sweeping up... something. He swallowed, trying to move his sword arm, only for him to realize it was caught. No, pinned. Slowly, he turned his head, trying to see what his arm was pinned under.

... wall. That was a section of wall.

One of the figures had turned to him. Galra, he realized, his heart picking up. They were Galra.

”Huh,” the one said, almost amused. “The Paladin’s still alive.”

The other turned, amazement on his face. “I didn’t think a human would be so tough,” he whispered.

”You didn’t hear about the Champion, did you?” The first came over to Keith, pulling off his helmet and grabbing his face. His clawed thumb lifted his lid, studying his eye. “Well, I’m not an expert in humans, but I can read dazed, and the Paladin looks pretty out of it.”

”We should kill it,” the other told him. “If they’re this tough, it’s going to get out and be a nuisance again. The other Paladins already retreated; we shouldn’t give them reason to return.”

They left him there? Keith set his jaw, not believing it. They wouldn’t leave one of their own. Something had to happen. If they left, they knew he was still there. They’d be back.

”I don’t think so.” The first one let him go, stepping back. “I think there’s a few of us that have some aggression to get out first. And if we take away all weapons...”

”The Champion did well without weapons. I heard that much.”

”After the druids did some modifications. This is an unmodified human. We can have some fun with it first.”

Keith’s hand flexed. He was going to kill them once he got free. And then get in Red and destroy the entire fleet. Just to get his own aggression out.

”I think we pissed it off, though,” the first one said conversationally. “It’s not going anywhere, though. Go get a sedative. And let the others know: We have a Paladin.”


	3. Chapter 3

If there was anything that Keith learned in his first few hours was that the Galra were a little unoriginal in their torture. Stringing him up and beating him black and blue? Really? He could deal with that until the others showed up.

When one of his ribs snapped under the Galra’s fists, he started to rethink that. Each breath turned into stabbing pain, the position his arms were in making it worse. Keith tried to take shallow breaths as the Galra took a step back, looking proud with himself.

Then the next one came up, studying him. He reached up, delicately taking Keith’s fingers.

The snapping of his bones were covered by Keith’s screams.

But he could do this. He could get through this. The others would be there soon. He panted through gritted teeth, trying not to move any broken bones. A few broken bones were nothing. He’d be fine. He broke bones on missions all the time.

That one stepped back, and it was almost a relief when the next just raised his fists, each blow landing squarely on his abdomen. It wasn’t broken bones, just something he could have endured in training. And Shiro hit harder than any of these Galra anyway.

When they all stepped away, all left, he let out a careful sigh of relief. It was over.

And then came the hooded figure. One similar to the one he had fought before. The grin under the hood was sharp, malicious. “I hear your broken bones,” the Galra purred. “This will not do.”

Energy crackled through him, bright, horrible, seeping deeper into his bones than anything else. Violating him to a core he didn’t know existed.

He screamed.

* * *

The next batch dislocated his shoulder when wrestling him into a new position, hands behind his back, kneeling.

They didn’t care. It was just another injury to their new toy, to a Paladin of Voltron. The druid would fix it up. Just like it fixed up the way one freed his arm only to break it. Just like it fixed up the broken jaw from a lucky punch.

Just like it poured itself into places it shouldn’t go and wound itself around deep parts of him that shouldn’t ever, ever be touched-! Keith found himself panting, and forcibly slowed his breathing. It was torture. He was going to be violated. Shiro had gone through worse than this. He still had all his limbs. All he had to do was hold on until the others arrived.

He heard the door open, and he looked over.

And saw the dagger in the Galra’s hand.

He tensed. They liked his fingers.

But instead the Galra slammed it to the hilt into his shoulder, wrenching a cry from his throat. He pulled it free, only to dig it in again to his arm, cutting deeply into his bicep. It would be healed, Keith thought dully as the dagger was yanked free. The druid would heal him. Heal their toy.

The next cut came across his face, deep enough to scratch across the bone of his cheek. A scar like Shiro’s, then, running under his eye.

Finally, he pulled Keith’s head back, and the blade sank into his stomach.

That made him gasp.

And then the dagger dragged downward, splitting his abdomen open with ease.

Keith felt like everything stopped as he felt something slither out from the new opening on his stomach.

”You- get out of the way!” The Galra was pushed out of the way by a druid, the sharp mouth twisted in anger. “We are not to kill the Paladin! You, hold the human’s innards in!” Another Galra rushed to his side, pushing what had slithered out back in.

Keith looked up, dull eyes catching the wild gaze of the Galra that had sliced him open just before the shock of energy rushed through him.

He wished he could pass out while this happened. But instead he felt every centimeter of his skin healing, ever part of his muscle and fascia stitching back together. He felt everything coming together in one large scar across his body, his arm healing, his cheek sealing shut.

And then it was over.

He was still alive.

* * *

Arms above his head again, back to the door.

They had broken his fingers again. This time, the druid hadn’t come to fix them.

Maybe now the druid only came when his life was in danger.

He heard the door open, and someone come in. Well, someone was bored. He steeled himself for more bruises, more broken bones. It would be over soon enough.

The zipper being undone was new.

He sighed. It was only a matter of time before they added rape into the mix. He had already been violated more than that fucking furry asshole could do by a druid. Just get it over with. Get a cock up his ass. One more nightmare for the road.

Clawed hands grabbed the remaining material on his hips, ready to pull.

”Stop.”

The familiar voice made Keith tense as the hands fell away. That couldn’t be-

”You are dismissed.”

He heard the Galra leave, but that still left that one. That disgustingly familiar...

Zarkon stepped in front of him, studying his face with dispassion. He reached out with a clawed hand, and Keith tensed, ready for more pain.

But instead, he lifted Keith’s chin with an almost gentle grip. “You haven’t been fed,” he mused. “You can subsist alone on druid energy, but it’s far more satisfying to eat, isn’t it?”

”I don’t need any handouts from you,” he hissed.

A cruel smirk graced Zarkon’s face. “Who said it was a handout?” His hand released Keith’s chin, stepping away.

Leaving Keith alone.

* * *

A Galra soldier let him down, leaving him in the middle of an empty room.

He was fed through a slot in the door, a tasteless glop that settled like lead in his stomach.

And then he was left alone. Utterly, utterly alone.

Somehow, that was worse.

* * *

When he woke up one day, Zarkon was standing in the corner of his room.

”Please, don’t get up,” Zarkon said, waving a hand as Keith tensed. “I’m only here to see how you’ve been doing. I see the soldiers have been following my orders.”

”What orders?” Keith asked hoarsely, his voice still rough from screaming.

Zarkon didn’t answer, only inclined his head. “You would make such a good soldier....”

”I would die first.”

”I thought you’d say that.” Zarkon shook his head. “I do find you interesting, Paladin. Most of your kind are adults, wise enough to know what they are fighting for. You... are not, and yet you fight like you do. I would like to know more about you. But my time is limited here. And I cannot say what will happen to you once I am called away from this vessel.”

Keith tensed. “Is that a threat?”

”Only my observations, Paladin.” Zarkon started to leave, then paused. “If they do disobey my orders... do tell me.”

And he left.


	4. Chapter 4

It was quiet.

It was always quiet now. Eerily so.

He thought he was used to quiet. Damn it, he used to live in the desert! Silence used to be his best friend. But this... this was different. This was a cold floor, and light barely high enough to see by. This was food pushed through a slot, the only interaction he had with the outside world at all.

Where were the others? Shouldn’t they have tried to break him out by now?

His bones ached. Broken, and healed, and it didn’t feel like they had quite healed right. That the druid had purposely dug in deeper than necessary and healed it wrong. Keith rubbed his previously dislocated shoulder, looking up at the ceiling. He would have to use the cryopod when he got back. It didn’t take care of scars, but it should reset anything wrong with his muscle and bones. He needed to be in best shape next time he went out in Red.

Red. Keith sighed, closing his eyes. Fuck. He would need to spring her free too. Where were they even keeping her right now? Was she still on this ship? Or had Zarkon already moved Red? That made him tense. He knew the Lions put up a particle barrier when left in hostile territory, so no one could get in but their pilots. But that didn’t mean someone could transport them (as they learned with Lance thinking with his dick yet again). They could have moved Red to the ship Zarkon was on. And then when he left, it would be Keith, alone, on a ship of Galra that wanted to do nothing more than hurt him.

Or possibly kill him, even by accident. His hand touched the scar on his stomach, tracing the line.

He needed to get out of there.

There was someone walking by. Keith tensed, waiting. Was this it? It was either someone coming to rescue him or someone coming to start torturing him again. Either way, it was something.

The footsteps paused outside the door.

Then the door opened.

”Oh, it’s just you,” Keith muttered as Zarkon stepped in. “What do you want?”

”I had heard rumblings that my soldiers were going to kill you tonight,” he said, disturbingly pleasant as Keith’s breath caught in his throat. “I’m pleased to see that you are still alive.”

”Why? So you can torture me yourself?”

There was something terrible in the smile that crossed Zarkon’s face. “Is that how you see me, Paladin?”

Keith snorted. “You’re not exactly one of the good guys.”

”And why do you think that, child?”

That made Keith tense again. “I’m not a child.”

”Hm.” Zarkon stepped in closer, and Keith took a deep breath as he leaned down, taking his chin in disturbingly gently clawed fingers. “Perhaps not,” he said softly. “But were you given a choice in this matter, Paladin? Or did your princess sign you up for this war without you knowing what you were fighting? Without you knowing the true scope of our empire?”

Keith looked away.

”Paladin, my time on this vessel grows short, and I must make a decision regarding you soon. I have been advised to leave you to your fate here on this ship, as long as that lasts.”

”You mean until the others rescue me,” Keith snapped out, looked back at him.

”Oh poor child.” The clawed hand on his chin moved, stroking his hair. “You haven’t heard, have you? They left you for dead.”

Keith froze. They wouldn’t. Those idiots wouldn’t ever leave anyone behind.

”Tsk. I suppose I should show you. Guard?” Zarkon moved away as a guard took his place, snapping cuffs around Keith’s wrists and ankles. “Come along, child. I suppose you should see this.”

The guard forced Keith to his feet, pushing him to follow Zarkon. A thought occurred to Keith as they walked that they thought so little of him that they didn’t even blindfold him as they brought him to a room. There was a projector in the middle that Zarkon went to, bringing up the display with a wave of his hand. “I had wondered myself where your fellow Paladins were a little earlier myself,” he told Keith, spinning the projection slightly. “As you can see, we are here. And this here... are your friends.”

Keith’s breath froze.

They were so far away... why were they that far away?

”Child.” Keith didn’t look up at Zarkon’s voice. “You’ve been left for dead, and when I leave, there’s a good chance that will happen within a day’s time.”

Keith swallowed.

”But I have been considering taking you with me. You interest me.”

”So as a pet,” he whispered, still not looking up at him.

”Would you rather be a pet, or tortured until your body gave up on you?” When Keith didn’t answer, Zarkon shook his head. “I suppose that is too hard a question to ask at this point. But keep it in mind. I will return before I leave to hear your answer.”

Keith didn’t even look at him as the guard pushed him out of the room, still stunned at what he had seen. The castle was so far away. Maybe that was a fake projection, or... or an old one, or something. But... it was so far away.

Maybe he had been left for dead.

”We’re going to have fun with you...”

Keith’s head whipped around at the guard’s voice just as he was pushed into his cell, the door slamming shut. He looked down at his still cuffed hands, teeth gritting.

Two choices.

He brought his cuffed hands over the scar on his stomach, feeling his bones ache.

And he didn’t know how short of a time he had before he had to make that choice.


	5. Chapter 5

After Zarkon’s ultimatum, Keith sat down in a corner, knees pulled up to his chest, cuffed ankles still allowing him limited movement. Everything told him to just take death. Better than being a fucking _pet_. It would be better to just accept that he was going to be tortured and raped to death within a day after Zarkon left.

But as a pet... there was a glimmer of a chance that he could _kill_ Zarkon. He would be close enough. And then he could get into Red and escape.

He shivered. It was a real option. Taking Zarkon’s offer was actually tempting enough that he was thinking about taking it. Everything told him to die with dignity, to never give in.

But _living..._

Keith pulled his knees closer.

He wanted to live.

He was only a teenager. He didn’t want to die.

Keith let his legs slide down, touching the scar on his stomach. It could happen again, and his body might give out before the druid could heal him up. Or it might still while the druid put him back together. Or they might not care and let his intestines pile onto the floor while they pulled down his pants and unzipped theirs-

Fuck.

His breath scraped in his throat, wet and harsh. If he stayed here, he was going to die a very painful death.

Keith barely noticed when more food was pushed into his cell as he stared up at the ceiling, the tiles blurring as he realized what his choices really were. What it would mean, either way.

”I’m so sorry,” he whispered, and he didn’t know for what choice he was whispering for.

Then he slowly made his way over to the food, his stomach rumbling for something more filling than something that looked like cold sludge.

* * *

He had stopped getting his hopes up when he heard sound outside his door. It was usually Zarkon, anyway. So when he heard someone stop, he didn’t even bother lifting his head. He wasn’t going to give Zarkon the satisfaction.

But then he heard voices. Too many voices. And when the door slid open, there were too many footsteps. Keith tensed.

”Don’t leave any marks.” The Galra didn’t even bother lowering his voice. “You two. Hold its arms above its head.”

Keith inhaled sharply as he was pulled to his feet, cuffed hands yanked over his head. He tried to struggle, feeling his bones ache with each pull. As the one who had spoke came closer, he looked down, his breath stuttering at the object in his hand. A gag.

He looked back up at the sadistic look on all their faces, hands flexing.

”Zarkon.”

All of them tensed, looking at the door. When it was empty of their Emperor, they all looked back at him with fury.

”He told you not to touch me,” Keith reminded them, his hands still flexing. “He won’t be happy if he finds out you disobeyed him.”

”You little-!”

”It’s just bluffing,” one of the Galra holding his arms said. “It won’t tell Zarkon.”

The one holding the gag smirked. “That is true.” Swiftly, he opened Keith’s mouth with a powerful grip on his jaw and shoved the gag in, tying it around his head. “Who wants to go first?”

Keith looked at them all with fury burning in his eyes.

The others looked back at him with sadistic glee.

Then the one standing in front of him froze. Everyone looked down, seeing the blade protruding from his chest. When he dropped, there was only Zarkon, the black bayard in his hand. The other two let go of him, only for Zarkon to move, taking one head and stabbing the other through the stomach.

Keith looked up at him, bound hands dropping as his breaths heaved in his chest.

Gently, Zarkon untied the gag, pulling it from his mouth. “I told you,” he rumbled. “You will die here within a day.” His hand gently stroked Keith’s head, a motion that made Keith shiver after seeing him kill three of his men without blinking an eye. “I will keep you safe, child.”

”You’re going to keep me as a pet,” Keith said shakily, looking up at him.

Zarkon cupped his chin, and Keith could feel the warning behind the motion. “Is it so bad?”

Was it so bad?

Keith licked his lips, taking a deep breath. Was it?

Then he made his decision.

”I’ll go with you.”

For his credit, Zarkon’s face didn’t change. “I’ll send someone to sedate you and move you to my ship shortly,” he said smoothly. “One of my men. You’ll be in safe hands, child.”

”Then why sedate me?”

”Because, Paladin...” Zarkon leaned in a little, his grip on Keith’s chin tightening. “I don’t quite trust you won’t try to escape. And that would just be foolish. I don’t want you hurting yourself.”

Keith shivered as Zarkon let him go. He would try to escape. To get on Red and fly away.

And instead he would be knocked out and taken onto Zarkon’s ship. As a pet.

Of his own free will.

”You’ll be safe, child.” Zarkon’s hand stroked his hair as he looked down. “Trust in me.”

Keith closed his eyes.

And nodded.


	6. Chapter 6

There wasn’t a bed in his new room. Just mounds and mounds of plush pillows and luxurious blankets.

Keith circled his room one more time, taking in the smooth walls and trying not to look at the spread left for him. Not even left a bed to curl up in... he felt his cheeks burn as he realized just how much of a pet he was now. He gently touched his throat, wondering when he was going to be collared. Because he knew that was coming.

But right now, he was left alone.

... he didn’t have any new clothes. Just the remains of the pants he had when he had been taken off the old ship onto Zarkon’s.

Was he... supposed to be nude while here?

”Fuck,” he muttered, rubbing his arms. Nope. He had at least that much dignity. Pants stayed on.

But there wasn’t much he really could do. No one was around, and even if someone was around, he was still dragging a little from the sedative. It would just be embarrassing to try and fight back now.

He shook his head. Mind needed to be clear. He had given in to gain a chance to fight back. He wasn’t going to let his mindset be ‘too embarrassed to try.’ When given the chance, he needed to fight back. To get Red and escape. No matter how far away the others were, he could get there on Red.

If they even wanted him back...

Keith shivered at the thought. They had to. They were dumb like that.

... where was the bathroom? And the shower? He hadn’t been clean in days, and he needed to go. Keith circled the room again, pressing on various points.

”Are you enjoying yourself?”

Zarkon’s voice made him jump a little, spinning to meet him. “Room could use a few things,” Keith told him archly. “Bed. Shower. Toilet.”

”Ah.” Zarkon stepped in, the door disappointingly closing behind him. He pressed a point on the wall, and it slid away, revealing a bathroom. “You should find all you require to clean yourself in there. The bed... well, don’t you have one?” He gestured to a particularly large pillow, big enough that Keith could curl up on it easily. “It’s the finest one I could find for my Paladin.”

Keith swallowed. It was a pet bed and they both knew it. Then again, wasn’t that what Keith had made himself? “It’s...”

”Did you want something else?” He could hear the threat in Zarkon’s voice.

”No,” he muttered. He didn’t want to know what Zarkon would do right now.

Zarkon reached out, gently stroking his hair. “I did promise you would be safe,” he said gently. “You will be given all you need. Only...” Keith tensed as Zarkon trailed off, his claws raking through his hair. “I only ask of you one thing.”

”And what’s that?” Keith asked, trying not to spit the words.

”Perfect obedience.”

The words sank heavily into Keith. He didn’t know if he’d be able to do that. “And if I don’t?”

Violently, Zarkon gripped Keith’s hair and wrenched his head back, baring his throat. “Then I will discipline you, of course,” he said, his voice extremely pleasant. “My men won’t kill you, not as long as I order them not to. But they would enjoy having an hour or two with a Paladin of Voltron.”

Keith swallowed. Zarkon let him go, and he stumbled back, breathing unevenly. “So I do as you say and I won’t be tortured,” he finally said, his voice rough.

”Oh child...” The hand came back, gentle again as it stroked his head. “It’s merely a punishment. I wouldn’t allow them to hurt you too badly.”

He tried not to laugh at that. Yeah right. Keith took a deep breath, weighing what Zarkon had just said. He wanted perfect obedience from him. Which would mean... acting like a pet. Taking the pillow as a bed.

What else would he want in time?

”Can I get some clothes?” he finally asked quietly.

Zarkon continued to stroke his head, considering. “I’ll send for some pants,” he told Keith. His fingers came down, grasping Keith’s chin and lifting it gently. “I do want you to be comfortable,” he told him. “I’m not a monster, despite what you’ve heard. Are you hungry, child?”

”Little bit,” he muttered.

”Then I will also send for some food. In the meantime, clean up and rest. You will be needed in due time.”

Keith shivered as Zarkon left. He was going to be tested soon for his obedience.

Fuck. What could Zarkon want? What would he be asked to do? Would he just be treated as a pet in front of the Galra empire, proving Zarkon bested a Paladin, or would Zarkon make him do something he didn’t want to do?

Fuck.

Keith shuddered, heading for the bathroom. He did need to clean up, and it was something to do. Something that kept him busy.

... at least Zarkon didn’t want him to be nude.


	7. Chapter 7

For the first few days, he was left alone. The only time anything happened was a slot would open on the wall and a plate would appear, smelling deliciously of meat and vegetable. Someone must have paid attention when they were feeding their human Champion. The meats and vegetables tasted odd, but not poisoned. Not drugged. Just not what he was used to.

And no silverware. Of course.

He had been provided with several black... tights was the best he could call them. They were practically skin. And that was all he had gotten. No underwear. The last time he took a shower, his old soiled clothes had mysteriously disappeared. So it was either those tights, or nothing at all.

There was little difference in his mind.

So now Keith was eating a slice of cooked meat with his fingers while sitting on a pretty pillow in nothing but black tights. How Lance would laugh at him.

That made the food sour in Keith’s stomach. So what if Lance would laugh at him. He left him there.

No. Keith took a deep breath. He didn’t. Zarkon just wanted him to think that. What he saw was... was a trick. They hadn’t left him. And he would just have to endure being a pet for a little bit. Either until he was rescued or he broke out. And then he’d be back with the others.

He picked up another bit of meat, then set it aside. Suddenly, he wasn’t hungry anymore. Absently, he licked his fingers clean, putting the plate against the wall. What was he going to do now... he didn’t want to work out right now. And there was only so much he could do in that limited space, taken up by so many pillows and blankets, without anything to practice against. He just... didn’t have anything to do.

It was boring, being a pet.

And that made Keith tense. He knew Zarkon was going to test his obedience soon. The phrase had been “ _perfect_ obedience.” What he was going to do... it was going to be something he didn’t want.

If he didn’t do it, he’d be punished. He snorted. Tortured. He’d be tortured.

What the hell would Zarkon want from him?

Keith sat there, staring at the wall, wondering. He didn’t think Zarkon would make him participate in blood sports like Shiro had been. He was a _pet_. Unless that’s what Galra did with their pets... no, Zarkon said he’d be safe. So it’d be something else.

A sound outside his room made him stand. Galra. The door opened, and a haggard woman wearing a dress with too many pockets stepped in, her ears set back in annoyance. “Hands out,” she said abruptly. “Don’t try to resist. I have three guards outside just itching for you to disobey.”

That made Keith’s skin crawl. Testing his obedience from the moment another came to get him. He grit his teeth and put his arms out, letting her cuff him. They were... quite comfortable, actually. Padded. It was weird.

Then she pulled out a wide silver band, and motioned for him to come closer. “Let me see your throat.” When he stepped closer, she whipped the band around his throat easily, locking it shut. She shifted it around until a loop hung in front of him. “Not much else I can do,” she muttered. “You don’t have a proper amount of fur.” A thin band appeared from one of her pockets, snapping around the loop on his collar. “Don’t embarrass yourself,” she told him. “The Emperor shoving you under his feet to keep you from hissing and spitting is just as powerful as him having you quietly by his side. It’ll be less work for you if you behave.”

Keith bristled at... everything, but before he could say anything, she was walking out the door, yanking on the chain. He stumbled after her, every part of him crawling as the guards trailed behind. What was going on? What was Zarkon doing now?

Once they reached a large set of double doors, she stopped, taking a deep breath. “Remember,” she hissed. “Don’t embarrass yourself.” With those words, she opened the door, her head noticeably tilted downward as she started through the doors at a much slower pace.

Keith kept his head up. He wanted to see.

It was... a meeting of some sort. Military? Keith met the gaze of several Galra, his jaw setting as they whispered among themselves, some of them snickering. But they all seemed to know who he was. He heard “Paladin” a few times as he was led towards Zarkon. When their group finally reached him, Keith glared up at Zarkon, who was taking the lead from the now meek woman.

Zarkon carded claws through his hair, urging him to sit by his feet. Keith inhaled sharply, looking over at the crowd. This was... he was going to show he had a Paladin as a pet in some way or another. And if he disobeyed, he’d be tortured.

Fuck.

He might even be tortured right in front of all of them.

And Zarkon was starting to get mad.

Keith looked down at his bound hands.

And slowly started to sit down by Zarkon’s feet.

What choice did he have?

* * *

That meeting had been _painfully_ boring. They had just gotten to budget balancing.

Keith rubbed his now free hands as he sat down on a pillow, groaning as he finally sat on something soft. It was almost a relief to be back in his little room.

The entire time he had been with Zarkon, he had been waiting for something. Anything. But he had just carded claws through his hair, absently scratching his head. Treating him like a pet. Nothing had happened, just... humiliation of being a Paladin of Voltron sitting by the feet of Emperor Zarkon.

He touched the collar still on his throat. The reminder that it wasn’t over yet. Zarkon had just pushed on his boundaries a little now. It hadn’t been too bad.

It would be soon.


	8. Chapter 8

Zarkon gently urged Keith’s head to rest against his armored calf as they listened to yet another advisor, his claws stroking his hair. Until now, Keith had no idea just how much _work_ went into maintaining this empire. And he had a feeling this was just the stuff his advisors couldn’t agree on, and there was more that was being handled behind the scenes. He half closed his eyes, drowsing slightly. This was boring as hell.

And he knew why he was there. Zarkon was showing off his new pet. Showing off the Paladin he had captured. The thought made him bristle, but he couldn’t do anything right now. Not in a room full of Galra like this. Not unarmed. If he had his bayard, then he would be fighting. But collared, _leashed_ , with nothing on but a pair of tights...

Finally, the meeting ended. Finally, his ass would be able to sit on something soft for a while. Keith stood slowly as Zarkon pulled on the lead, legs and backside stiff. He stood next to him as everyone exited the hall, noticing how some of them were looking back at him. Glaring. Whatever.

”Hm.” Zarkon’s voice rang through the now empty hall as he strode forward. “I’ve heard some interesting things today.”

Keith suppressed a snort. That meeting had been painfully boring.

Zarkon turned to look at Keith, his face thoughtful. “I will have you return to your room,” he told him. “There are some things I have to think about.” He nodded as the servant woman Keith was starting to get to know, handing her the leash. “Reward him for his good behavior today.”

That was new. Keith felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise, the words settling hard in his stomach. What could a reward from the Galra be?

The servant woman bowed and started to leave, subtly pulling a little harder than needed on Keith’s leash. He followed her, his heart pounding in his chest. This woman did not like him for whatever reason. What would she do as a reward?

When he entered his room and she unclipped his leash, she snorted. “Reward you,” she mocked. “For just sitting there like a good pet.” She unlocked the cuffs on his wrists, shaking her head. “You already get _meat._ I suppose we could send up a sweet or two. For doing nothing more but sitting there.” She glared at him as she tucked the cuffs and leash away. “You’re too fucking spoiled, Paladin.”

”You could let me go,” he told her, hope rising. “Get me out of here.”

A twisted grin crossed her face. “Why would I do that? You’re going to slip up soon. And I will be there to watch you fall.” She half-turned to leave, then stopped. “And anyway, you being the Emperor’s little pet is better for all of us. You’ll see.”

When she left, Keith swallowed hard. She had to be referencing the fact Voltron couldn’t be formed without him. That was all. Nothing else. She couldn’t be saying he was better off here.

He rubbed his arms, going to sit down on a pillow. She couldn’t be telling him he belonged here.

She couldn’t be.

* * *

More meetings. If this was all it took to be a pet, Keith would take it. They were starting to overlook him now. Maybe soon he’d be able to take a weapon off one of them and start cutting through them to his Lion. No one was careless enough around him, yet.

Zarkon’s hand in his hair stopped. Keith opened his eyes, feeling his heart pick up. What now? This hadn’t happened before. He tensed as Zarkon rose, still holding onto his leash.

”It’s a pretty story,” he rumbled, his voice cold and angry. “But it doesn’t hide how you allowed an entire planet to fight back and push us away. Not just allowed it, but actively helped in it.”

”My Lord!” The Galra commander that had been talking opened his yellow eyes wide. “I would-”

”I have reports that prove otherwise. Images. You, Commander Montiek, have been helping the rebels. There are rumors you have been helping Voltron as well.”

Keith’s gaze snapped over to Zarkon. Voltron? There were Galra that actually helped them? No- why did he care? They left him. It had been weeks... they weren’t coming back for him. They abandoned him. He just... wanted to get into Red and leave this place. Not be a pet.

”My Lord Emperor!”

”You know what the penalty is,” Zarkon told him, told the group. He turned to another officer, taking the offered energy sword. Then he turned to Keith, hilt out. “Pet. Take his head.”

The words ran through him like ice. He wanted Keith to kill for him. No- no, he couldn’t. He couldn’t do this. A pet- he wasn’t-

Slowly, Keith took the sword in one cuffed hand, arms shaking slightly. Zarkon expected him to take the traitor’s head.

But he was easily within range to kill Zarkon now. He could turn and stick him, right through the chest. This kind of sword would go through all his armor like butter. He wouldn’t make it out alive, but Zarkon would be stopped.

His arms shook.

And if he failed, he would just be dead. Killed like this traitor.

”Is something wrong, pet?”

Keith shook his head, his hand tightening on the sword. He knew what he had to do.

And he dropped it.

”Ah.” Zarkon’s hand came up, and gripped his hair tightly, pulling his head back. “Still a disobedient pet. No matter. That can be trained out.” He let go of Keith’s head, bending down to get the sword. And with one easy motion, took the traitor’s head.

Keith watched. He had done it. He didn’t kill for Zarkon. Zarkon had to do his dirty work himself.

Why did it feel like he lost?

”You. Take him away.”

The servant woman grabbed his lead, pulling him out of the room. He followed numbly, his hands flexing in his cuffs. He was going to be punished now.

It had to be better than giving in to Zarkon.

* * *

The lash slithered behind him again. Keith breathed heavily, his back alit with pain as he felt blood dripping down his back. He had stopped counting the lashes at twenty. Maybe they were going to one hundred. Maybe they just had a time limit they were filling.

When he had first been tied up, arms far apart, he had been expecting anything. But something as simple as a whip, the kiss of the lash against his skin over and over until it split and bled... he closed his eyes, trying to focus past the pain.

He heard someone step close to him. Then something cold touched his back and he gasped as it smeared across the wounds. It made them burn worse, throb to the point he couldn’t think of anything else.

Finally, he was let down. Keith stumbled a bit, biting back a hiss of pain as he got his legs under him, his arms falling to his side. Galra cuffed his wrists again, clipping a leash to his collar and pulling him out without a word.

When they finally made it back to his room, one of the guards turned to him, holding up a small vial. “Put this on your back after you clean yourself every day,” he told him, curling Keith’s fingers around the vial. “We wouldn’t want those to get infected, would we?”

And then he was led into his room and uncuffed. When the door closed, leaving him alone, Keith closed his eyes.

No druid healing for him this time. So that was part of the punishment. He had to heal the old fashioned way.

But he made it through it. He did it.

Why did it feel like he lost?


	9. Chapter 9

The gel that Keith put on his back made the wounds burn. Just a sickening roll of fire down his back with each breath. But this stuff would keep those wounds from infecting. He had to put it on. He wasn’t going to be healed any other way.

Keith washed his hands, breathing heavily through his nose. That had... set back any thoughts of escaping pretty hard. He wasn’t going to be able to do anything with his back like this. It should have felt great that he stuck to his morals, that he didn’t kill someone that was a traitor to the Galra empire, but... the thought rolled around in his stomach, heavy.

He sighed, sitting carefully on a pillow. At least Zarkon wasn’t going to call for him for a while after that. He shouldn’t, anyway. Keith wasn’t up for sitting for hours on a hard floor like this.

Unless that was part of the punishment.

Keith rubbed his face, closing his eyes tightly. He didn’t give in. He was a pet, not... not Galra. Not one of his soldiers Zarkon could order around. He...

But Zarkon had wanted _perfect_ obedience from him, and he failed to deliver it. So was that part of being a pet too?

What had he gotten himself into?

He shivered. What would happen the next time Zarkon asked him to kill someone? He had been so close to actually sticking Zarkon with the sword... but he just couldn’t do it. Something stilled his hand.

That had to go. He had to start thinking of killing Zarkon at any chance. At any risk to his own life. He had to do some good for the universe.

Carefully, he rolled over onto his stomach and laid on the pillow. Normally, he’d pull one of those too soft blankets over him, but... not like this. Not after being whipped like that.

Maybe he could get a little sleep. Just a little unconsciousness so he didn’t have to think about the position he was in and what Zarkon wanted him to do. Keith shifted his head into a comfortable position, and breathed out.

Soon, he fell into a doze. The sound of his door opening roused him, making him open his eyes and look over at who had come in.

It was Zarkon. “My pet.” He didn’t come closer, just stared down at him disapprovingly. “What did I tell you in the beginning? As long as you give me perfect obedience, I will keep you safe. You knew this, and you still disobeyed me. And-” Zarkon strode forward, grasping Keith by the hair and lifting him, forcing him to shift onto his knees and kneel. “Don’t think I could not see that you were thinking of coming after me with that sword. I’m quite thankful you didn’t. I did not want to be out a pet this early.”

Keith glared at him, pain newly aflame in his back. “I’ve seen what you’ve done out there,” he growled. “So sue me for thinking I could stop that.”

Zarkon stared at him for a moment longer, then let him go. “Your princess told you many things to sign you up for her war, didn’t she. Perhaps I should ask for you for more meetings...”

He hadn’t asked for him for all the meetings? Keith sat back on his heels, inhaling. “What, you’re actually the good guys? Is that what you want me to believe?”

”Only that you don’t know what are the lies... and what is the truth.” Zarkon shook his head. “But do understand this one truth, Paladin. Child. My pet. As long as you give me perfect obedience, you will be safe by my side. I will not let anything harm you.”

Keith shivered as Zarkon left. He was just... saying stuff. To throw him off. He didn’t... he couldn’t...

He couldn’t mean that Allura had _lied_ to them?

* * *

Ow. This meeting had gone on for far too long.

Keith tried not to shift his weight. Every time he did, Zarkon’s hand in his hair tightened warningly. He wasn’t going to do anything but get comfortable. But he stilled, and Zarkon would go back to petting his hair as Galra would talk about things that meant nothing to him.

Maybe it would have. At one point. When he was still the Red Paladin, still part of Voltron. Maybe it could still be useful, if he could get out and do some good out in the universe. He closed his eyes as Zarkon continued to stroke his hair.

It occurred to him that he had stopped thinking of himself as the Red Paladin, currently. But... how could he be part of Voltron if they just left him there? They obviously didn’t want him if they didn’t come for him.

He felt Zarkon pull on his lead. Carefully, he stood as Zarkon did, staring around the room. People were starting to leave. Meeting over, then. Not a moment too soon at that. Keith watched them leave, waiting for whatever Zarkon would do next.

”Did you learn anything, pet?” A clawed hand reached out, gently stroking his face.

”Other than that was incredibly boring?”

Zarkon frowned. “You were not paying attention.”

Keith just stared up at him, almost glaring.

With a sigh, Zarkon let his face go. “I suppose forcing you to be interested in politics is asking too much. You are merely a pet, after all.” He stared at Keith thoughtfully as the servant woman came to his side, ready to take the leash. “Hm. You’ve been better since your punishment... perhaps I should give you another reward.”

Last reward had been tasty. He wouldn’t mind another desert like that.

”Bring him to my room tonight,” he told the servant woman.

Keith felt the bottom of his stomach fall out.


	10. Chapter 10

A reward. Keith paced around his pillows, hands caught into fists. What could Zarkon consider a reward that required him to go to his room? There was only one thing that came to mind, and it wasn’t something he particularly wanted. But then again, wasn’t the requirement here _perfect_ obedience?

Damn it. Why had he let himself get into this situation?

Because if he hadn’t, he would have met a grisly and painful death.

Keith shook his head. At this time, he wondered if that would have been better. One hand came up to touch the collar around his throat, a constant reminder now of his pet status. It wasn’t so bad, usually, but-

He wasn’t- he was-

No. He wasn’t a Paladin of Voltron anymore. Keith let his hand drop. They left him there for the Galra to play with, and if it wasn’t for Zarkon, he would be dead right now. It was still left to see if that was any better than being dead.

His stomach tied into knots, half reminding him he hadn’t been fed despite the anxiety crawling through it. But Keith didn’t know if he could eat right now anyway. The ideas of what Zarkon could consider rewards ran through his head, all of them making him shiver.

Finally, the servant woman appeared in his doorway, holding his leash and cuffs. “Come along,” she said briskly, snapping both items on him. Head held high, Keith followed her out of the room, keeping an eye on where they were going. If he ever got loose, he needed to know how to get to Zarkon’s room.

Finally, they stopped in front of what appeared to be any other door, and the servant woman reached out to a panel next to it, her fingertips touching the pad firmly. It glowed, and slid open for her. With a harsh yank, she pulled Keith in, her head bowed low in deference to Zarkon.

Zarkon gently took the lead from her, pulling Keith to him with a firm pressure. “You may go now,” he told the woman, not even looking at her. Keith didn’t even watch her leave as Zarkon looked him up and down, a horrible smile crossing his face. “Have you eaten?” he rumbled, cupping his chin.

”No.” Keith glared up at him, taking deep breaths. What was Zarkon getting at?

Zarkon only nodded, letting go of Keith’s chin and pulling him over to a table with a covered dish. “I had thought you wouldn’t be fed.” He turned to Keith, and nodded at the floor. “Kneel, pet.”

What the- Keith set his jaw, kneeling. What the hell was Zarkon thinking?

Zarkon pulled the cover off the dish, revealing a spread of meat, vegetables, and what appeared to be one of those little sweets he had before. Keith relaxed. Was this all? Food?

”Open up, pet.” Zarkon picked up a piece of meat, looking at him expectantly.

Keith froze. Food. That Zarkon wanted to _feed_ to him. Finger feed. Oh fuck.

But it could be so much worse. This was just humiliating. He could easily refuse. Whipping was painful, but not that bad.

His stomach grumbled, and he was opening his mouth before he realized it. The bit of meat gently laid on his tongue, and Keith considered snapping at Zarkon’s fingers before they were pulled back. He chewed the meat slowly, glaring up at Zarkon as he swallowed. The next piece of meat was between Zarkon’s fingers quickly, and Keith opened his mouth again.

After everything had been eaten and the sweet disappeared into Keith’s mouth, dissolving quickly to be swallowed, Zarkon pressed his fingers against Keith’s lips. “Lick them clean.”

Was he kidding? Keith glared up at Zarkon and nope, he was not kidding. What the hell. Keith entertained the idea of not doing so, or biting down when his fingers were in his mouth, but how Zarkon’s eyes narrowed at him when he didn’t open his mouth fast enough made him lick his tongue out, lapping the digits clean.

Finally, _finally_ it was over with, and Zarkon pulled back. “Good pet.” He motioned to a side room, smiling horribly at Keith. “Strip and lay on your back on the bed.”

No.

No, no. He wasn’t going to do this. Zarkon would have to force him. He wasn’t going to be complacent in that.

A hand tangled in his hair, pulling his head back painfully. “I said strip and lay on the bed. You want your reward, don’t you?”

”And how is that a reward?” Keith hissed at him, bound hands flexing.

Zarkon only smiled. He knelt next to Keith, hand going between his legs and flattening over Keith’s groin, rubbing. “You haven’t felt much pleasure since you’ve been here,” he purred. “Sitting on those hard floors... being disciplined... and the little pleasures we have given you haven’t been enough, are they?” He shook Keith’s head slightly as his hand traced the hardening outline of Keith’s cock. “I want only want what’s best for you, pet.”

Keith bit back a groan, staring up at the ceiling. He wasn’t going to give Zarkon the satisfaction.

”Good pets get rewarded.” Zarkon’s hand continued it’s rubbing, and Keith tried not to gasp at the feeling. “I’m never going to hurt you if you do as I say, my pet.”

That made a slight laugh bubble over Keith’s lips before he could stop it. “So instead you’re going to rape me.”

”Oh no.” Zarkon’s lips found his ear, nipping. “You’ll come willingly when that time comes. Right now...” His hand slipped into Keith’s tights, wrapping around his half hard cock. “It’s only a little taste of pleasure.”

Keith closed his eyes.

With that, Zarkon let go of his hair, pulling down his tights enough that his cock was free, and Zarkon could stroke it unimpeded. Fuck, it... it felt _good._ Keith’s teeth grit as Zarkon’s hand moved, Zarkon shifting so he could pull Keith against his body. Slowly, Keith’s eyes opened as he groaned, looking up into Zarkon’s smirking face.

It wasn’t long until he was spilling over Zarkon’s fingers. Finally. It was over. Keith’s eyes remained staring at the ceiling, trying to ignore the oily feeling in his stomach. The feeling he was going to see his dinner again right then and there.

When Zarkon’s fingers pressed against his lips, he didn’t even need to be told to lick them clean. Just get it over with. Go back to his room.

”Good pet.” Zarkon’s now clean hand wrapped around his middle, Keith shivering as he hugged Keith to him. “You’ll go back to your room until I ask for you again.”

Keith closed his eyes.

It was over.

The oily feeling remained in his stomach the entire trip back, until he could make it to his toilet, retching.

But he had done it. It was over. He was okay.

He was okay.


	11. Chapter 11

The taste of Zarkon’s fingers stayed with him.

It shouldn’t. He needed to forget about it. Forget that Zarkon had fed him, and had jerked him off. But oh, did all of it feel so good. It shouldn’t, but it did. Keith laid on his back on his pillow, staring up at the ceiling.

Trying to say Zarkon didn’t care, that he was just saying things... the fact that he had rescued him when Voltron abandoned him stared him right in the face. A horrible thought occurred to Keith... what if the only reason the other Galra had wanted to torment and kill him was they still thought he was a Paladin of Voltron?

What if he renounced that?

It wouldn’t be hard. Just outright say he wasn’t a Paladin anymore. They had already made it clear they didn’t care about him. All he would be doing at that point was making it public. And there were other ways to help take down Zarkon than be a Paladin.

Keith lifted his hand, letting it rest on his forehead. Take down Zarkon.

It sounded more and more hollow each time he thought it.

Everything Zarkon had done had been humiliating, but... he was a pet, right? Pets were treated like this. Zarkon was only doing what people did to pets.

But he was also a human being.

Keith closed his eyes.

Maybe the two identities had more in common than he thought.

When he heard his door open, he didn’t immediately get up. Then, at the servant woman’s clearing of throat, he sat up slowly, looking at her.

”Come along,” she told him, pulling out the cuffs. “Time for you to sit and look pretty.”

He stood, holding his hands out to be cuffed. Then he leaned forward a bit, helping her leash him. She frowned at the help, her ears back as Keith looked at her. “What?” he asked, trying not to snap the word.

”You’re starting to learn your place,” she muttered. “Well. It doesn’t change the fact the Emperor spoils you. You just come right in, a Paladin of Voltron, and you’re already being fed meat and sweets. You should be fed gruel and left here to rot.”

Keith closed his eyes. A Paladin of Voltron. Except... “They left me here to die,” he whispered. “I don’t think Voltron cares if I’m a Paladin anymore or not.”

After a moment, he opened his eyes to see her staring at him, her gaze thoughtful. “Hm.” The woman wrapped her hands around the lead, pulling gently. “Come along. We’ve already wasted enough time.”

He let her pull him down the halls, feeling her yank a little more gently now. When they reached the audience hall, she turned to him, fussing with his hair a little. “The Galra empire would never leave a kit behind,” she told him firmly. “The fact Voltron did...” Her upper lip rose in a snarl. “You definitely are better off here, spoiled as you are. The Emperor will take care of you.”

The words made him look away. Scarily enough... he had a feeling at least part of that was true.

”You need more fur,” she muttered. “This on your head isn’t enough. But there’s not much I can do about that. Are you ready?”

It was the first time she had asked that. “Yeah.”

She nodded once, turning to open the door. As she did, Keith straightened up. He might be a pet, but that didn’t mean he had to slink around. Instead, he kept his head high as Zarkon caught his eye. The woman handed his lead off to Zarkon, and Keith took his seat at Zarkon’s feet.

Zarkon’s possessive hand in his hair almost felt natural by now.

* * *

When the servant woman came in next time, he rose without a question, holding his wrists out.

”Here,” she muttered, shoving something into his hand and closing it. “Don’t tell anyone. You don’t deserve this yet.”

That made Keith’s eyebrows climb. He turned his hand opening it enough to see a tiny sweet in it. “Why?”

”Because you’re still a child, and no child should be left alone. I would have never abandoned mine.” She covered his hand with a gentle paw. “If you stop being a Paladin of Voltron, you’ll be safe here. We’ll take care of you.”

”You hate me,” he said bluntly, looking up at her.

”I hate that a Paladin of Voltron is getting more than any of us ever will,” she shot back. “I wasn’t aware you had been abandoned.” She looked down at their hands, sighing. “You still get more here than you deserve,” she told him. “You should work for this instead of sitting there. But...” One of her hands rose, stroking his hair back. “No matter how I feel, with the Emperor at your side, you’re safe here.”

Keith looked away.

The woman let him go, stepping away. “It’s better being here,” she told him. “Better a child like yourself doesn’t go out and get himself killed over whatever you’ve been told about us. Misleading children...” She didn’t spit, but she looked like the words left enough of a sour taste in her mouth that she wanted to. “You have no idea what we’ve done for the universe.”

It had to be Galra propaganda she was sprouting. What every Galra was told to make them want to fight for the Empire.

But right now, it was almost soothing to know that maybe Allura wasn’t as good as they all thought. It made it easier to digest that he had been abandoned. That Allura had been the one to order it, that maybe she was lying to them about something.

It was almost soothing to think that maybe he really was in the right hands.

”Eat your treat,” the woman told him gently. “I’ll be back when the Emperor calls for you.”

Keith nodded. When she left, he looked down at his hand, at the slightly squashed treat there. Then, he popped it into his mouth, letting it dissolve before swallowing.

Allura might be lying to the Paladins about what the Galra empire had done. He knew what they did to their slaves; Shiro was proof of how cruel they could be to who they enslaved. But at the same time, what had the Galra done for the universe as a whole? Had they helped people that couldn’t help themselves? Had they started trade routes where they had been none before? Bolstered an economy that had crashed?

Keith rubbed his arms. No, it all had to be propaganda. The Galra, they...

He touched the scar on his stomach.

They had hurt him when they thought he was a Paladin.

But now that he was a pet, they didn’t touch him.

If he just... told Zarkon he wasn’t a Paladin anymore... that after what they had done, he...

Keith swallowed.

”I am not a Paladin of Voltron,” he whispered to the empty room.

It almost sounded right.


	12. Chapter 12

Keith closed his eyes as Zarkon ran his fingers through his hair. Another boring political meeting. At one time, this would have meant something. Some insight into how to take down the Galra empire.

He wasn’t a Paladin of Voltron anymore, though. He was... a pet. Zarkon’s pet. So whatever it was didn’t matter to him.

The more he thought about what the woman had said, the more it made sense. They had abandoned him. But Zarkon had made sure to save his life. It was more than any of them had done. Keith tilted his head a little into the touch, still feeling slightly ill at complying like this. But he had been against the Galra for so long. He had been twisted around by whatever Allura had told them, and not known what the Galra people really were like. Letting go of the thought that they were evil... they had done horrible things, but there was good.

It didn’t change the leaden feeling in his stomach that said he was betraying everything he was, everyone he knew.

Fuck that feeling. He wasn’t a Paladin.

But... he didn’t know if he would actually _fight_ for the Galra empire if Zarkon asked. He just couldn’t... let that feeling go. If he could, then everything would be okay.

His eyes opened, catching on the servant woman in the corner. Her face was downcast, waiting. Like a servant, he guessed. Which would make sense. Keith did kind of wish he could catch her eye, though. She had started to become the mother he never had. Every once and a while, she’d sneak him a few treats. When she had a free moment, she would come to his room. It was strange to have someone doting over him, fussing over the “abandoned kit,” but... it was kind of nice.

Something he never had before.

Zarkon’s hand fell away from his hair as he stood, leash slack in his grasp. Keith eyed it, a thought overcoming him. If he wanted to, he could pull the leash out of Zarkon’s grasp completely and find a way to fight back.

But... why would he? He had things here he never had.

Keith just waited instead. Zarkon had something important to say.

But it never came. Just as Zarkon opened his mouth, a Galra commander pulled out his sword and rushed at them. “Vrepit sa!” came the scream from his mouth as he swung down.

Keith instantly rolled to one side, feeling a new freedom in movement as the sword sliced through the leash. He instantly came to his feet, cuffed hands up, waiting.

Instead of turning to Zarkon, attacking him, the commander looked over at Keith. A wild fanaticism had overtaken his face, hatred in every line. “Paladin,” he hissed, pointing the sword at Keith. “I have put up with you at our Emperor’s side long enough. You have heard too much.” With that, he swung at Keith again, forcing him to dodge.

A glance at Zarkon revealed him to be interested. But not that he would step in. Keith set his jaw, watching the commander. This had to be a test.

And if he failed it, he would be dead.

Keith dodged another swipe, feeling the point graze across his shoulder. Damn it. He needed to disarm him. Keith’s eyes stayed on the commander’s sword, waiting. He just- there! Keith slipped around a thrust, grabbing his wrist and twisting. And for added bonus, he shifted his weight so his knee slammed into the Galra’s armor. He could feel the pain blossoming through his leg, but the impact had taken the commander by surprise. Enough so that Keith could pull the sword out of his grasp, and thrust it upward through his neck. Viciously, he swiped out, cutting his throat open.

The commander slumped against him, dying quickly in his arms. Disgusted, Keith shoved him off, turning to Zarkon.

Who was staring at him with open pleasure. Keith’s hand shook as he grasped the sword, every Paladin instinct telling him to run Zarkon through.

Instead, he turned to sit at his side again, jaw set as he laid the sword across his legs, blatantly telling everyone there that he wasn’t to be messed with. His eyes caught the servant woman’s, and she looked _fiercely_ proud of him.

”If there’s anyone else who has a problem with my pet, please come forward,” Zarkon said coolly, his hand reaching down to stroke Keith’s head.

No one else came forward.

Keith just felt numb.

* * *

He never liked hugs. So when the servant woman pulled him into one after taking him back to his room, Keith’s first instinct was to pull back. But at the same time... it felt like a mother hugging her son after he did something to be proud of.

So instead, he hugged her back, wanting to feel that more.

”You did so well,” she murmured. “My furless kit.”

Keith had to laugh at that. “So you’ve adopted me.”

”Someone has to.”

Keith just went quiet at that, resting his chin against her shoulder. Someone had to.

Maybe not being a Paladin of Voltron was for the best.

”I’m not,” he muttered. “I’m not a Paladin of Voltron.”

”I know that,” she told him, pulling back to stroke his hair. “You haven’t been since you got here. But some of us... it takes us a while to learn that.” Her lips quirked, clearly remembering how she treated him at first.

He closed his eyes, smiling a little as she let him go. Yeah. This was right.

”The Emperor’s going to want to reward you again. Clean up, child, and I’ll come back when he calls for you.”

Reward. Keith swallowed, remembering the last one. Could he actually let Zarkon do what he clearly wanted to do to Keith’s body? “I will,” he told her, opening his eyes. “Thank you.”

She patted his head one more time before leaving.

A reward. Keith started to strip, asking himself over and over... could he do it?

Zarkon wanted perfect obedience...

* * *

”Come here, pet.” Zarkon motioned next to him as the servant woman (he really needed to ask her name) released his leash and left the room. Keith came up beside him, starting to kneel. That was usually what Zarkon wanted. When he finally gingerly put his weight on his aching knee, he waited, closing his eyes as Zarkon brushed a hand through his hair.

”Ah, I was right in thinking you would be a wonderful soldier,” he finally rumbled. “So fierce. But you’re much better by my side, I think.”

Keith just waited. He would never be a soldier. That he wouldn’t do.

Gently, Zarkon grasped his chin, forcing him to look up at him. “You’re such a good pet,” he told him. He bent down, lightly running his claws over Keith’s torso. “You need to be rewarded for being such a good pet.” His hand stroked over Keith’s groin, making him gasp. Slowly, he made Keith turn so he was leaning into Zarkon, looking down as Zarkon pushed down his pants and lightly stroked him. “Would you come willingly into my bed?”

”I-”

When Keith didn’t follow up on that, not sure if he could answer one way or the other, Zarkon just laughed. “You’ll get there soon enough.”

Keith just closed his eyes, submitting to the feeling of Zarkon’s hands on him, the pleasure zinging through him with each stroke.

It felt good.

It was starting to feel less like defeat.


	13. Chapter 13

The thought that he might actually kill the other Paladins if they appeared ran through his head one night.

Keith stared up at the ceiling as it slipped in. It didn’t... sound wrong. They had abandoned him. So why wouldn’t he attack them for pulling that? But... if he had a weapon, he might actually try to kill them. He’d probably be able to take out Pidge or Hunk easily considering they wouldn’t be expecting anything like that and they were really the weakest, combat wise. Lance would be harder with that rifle of his. Shiro... he’d have to get lucky.

He was really considering killing the Paladins of Voltron.

Keith rolled over, trying to dislodge the unease he felt at that. So what? What had they done for him? Zarkon had saved him when they abandoned him. And now he had someone like a mother to him. That’s what mattered.

Lightly, his hand touched the collar around his throat. His mark of being a pet. Maybe this was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Keith closed his eyes, trying to hold onto that feeling. That this was the best outcome.

He heard the door open, and when he sat up, he saw the servant woman come in, one clawed finger to her lips. Ah, a treat. She nodded with a smile he held out one hand, wrapping his hand around the sweet. “I didn’t get to reward you for doing so well,” she told him, her voice full of fondness. “You reacted so quickly, and you were so fierce. Any Galra kit would be jealous of you.”

Keith laughed a little at that. “Thank you.” Then he hesitated, covering her hand with his other one. “Hey... what’s your name?”

She blinked, her ears twitching. “Child, I was only appointed your personal servant. I bring the food,” she nodded to the slot it appeared at “and present you to the Emperor. This is not-”

”You’re also the closest thing I’ve had to a mother. Please.”

”Ever?” she asked, aghast as he nodded. “You were abandoned as a little kit? My furless kit, no. How can humans be so cruel?” She shook her head. “Zornia. I am Zornia.”

Keith squeezed her hands. “Thank you, Zornia.”

Zornia smiled. “Eat your treat. The Emperor has no meetings today. Relax a bit.”

”I will.”

Zornia leaned in, kissing his cheek. “Oh, my furless kit, I am so happy you’re in a place now that you will be taken care of.”

Keith let her hands go as she stepped back, smiling to himself. He kind of liked being called her furless kit. Made him feel... welcome. Loved. He popped the sweet into his mouth, laying back down.

Next time Zarkon asked, he decided, he would go with complete obedience. He deserved to give that much.

His skin crawled at the idea.

* * *

The next time Zornia came for him, it was obvious it was to take him to Zarkon. He rose, obediently putting his hands out.

She shook her head, covering his hands. “The Emperor wants you to be unbound.” Zornia studied him, sudden worry in her face. “You will comply with that, right? The guards never stopped losing the lust to discipline you for stepping out of line.”

Meaning would he run or attack anyone if he wasn’t cuffed. Keith nodded without thinking about it. He wasn’t a Paladin of Voltron anymore. Why would he?

Zornia smiled a little. “Then follow me.” She turned, and Keith followed her out of the room, past scowling guards. Past several frowning Galra, some turning their nose up at him. But Zornia would hiss at them, making them jump and continue on. That made Keith chuckle a little as she lead him down not the usual hallway, but a familiar one nonetheless.

The one to Zarkon’s bedroom.

She turned to him once they reached the door, fussing with his hair. “You need more fur,” she told him. “But you wouldn’t be my furless kitten if you did, would you.” Zornia smiled at him, placing a hand on his chest. “Do well.”

Keith nodded, looking at the door as she opened it, letting him in.

Zarkon... was sitting in a chair, reading reports. “Thank you,” he said distractedly. “Pet, come here.”

Zornia left them, and Keith instantly went to Zarkon, kneeling. When Zarkon pulled on his arm, forcing him to rest up against his leg, he went calmly. The hand on his head felt nice as he closed his eyes, cheek against Zarkon’s armor.

”I feel they can’t do anything without my approval,” Zarkon finally grumbled. “Pet.” He put down his tablet, nudging Keith slightly. “Do put your mouth to good use.”

Keith froze. He had no idea what Zarkon had between his legs... if that was what he was implying. He licked his lips, looking up at him as the hand in his hair pulled back. Zarkon frowned, gesturing to his lap. Well then, that was what he meant. Carefully, Keith moved in front of him, fishing for some kind of zipper and managing to find something to pull down.

And well then, looked like underwear just wasn’t a thing for Galra. Keith swallowed, trying to ignore the little part in his head screaming at him to stop, this wasn’t what he wanted. Zarkon was huge even soft, and he had no idea if he was going to be able to fit that in his mouth when erect. Leaning in, he opened his mouth and licked a long stripe up the soft flesh, making Zarkon groan. Spurred on by that, Keith placed his hands on Zarkon’s thighs, shifting so he could do it again, feeling it harden under his tongue. Before it grew too much, he took it into his mouth, wanting at least to do this for a bit. He knew this was what Zarkon wanted. For Keith to open his jaw as far as it could, taking as much in as he could take. Zarkon didn’t taste like any cock he remembered, but it wasn’t bad. Just different.

Finally, he had to pull off, the stretch on his jaw too much. And Zarkon still wasn’t fully hard. Instead, he wrapped his hand around his cock the best he could and stroked, lapping at the head. Zarkon ran a possessive hand through his hair, then gripped it and pulled his head back. “Bed,” he hissed.

Bed. Keith swallowed. Every part of him said to beg off. To refuse him again. No. He didn’t want this.

Instead, he slipped off his tights and went to the bed. As soon as he reached it, Zarkon pushed his torso down, pressing a clawed finger against his hole. Keith’s breath froze in his chest as it worked in, some kind of slickness, some kind of lube on it. It was happening. He was finally going to give in, to be fucked.

No, he didn’t want this.

Keith closed his eyes, trying to relax. He owed this to Zarkon. At least he was stretching him first. Lubing him up. The pain would be less.

It still sent bolts of pain through him when Zarkon pushed into him. He was much bigger than Keith thought. Much bigger. Keith bit back a scream, knowing he was bleeding now. That much prep wasn’t enough. No amount of prep would be enough for how big that was. He breathed raggedly through his nose as Zarkon thrust into him, letting him use his body despite every urge to throw him off. To make him stop. Despite the now loud voice in his head saying he didn’t want this.

He was a pet.

It didn’t matter what he wanted.

When Zarkon finally emptied into him, a long pulse that filled him up, Keith sighed. It was over.

And then Zarkon nipped at his ear. “You didn’t finish as well?” One hand reached around him, palming his soft cock until it grew rigid, making Keith grasp at the bedsheets as Zarkon stroked him languidly, still inside of him.

Keith closed his eyes as he came, giving himself over to Zarkon-


	14. Chapter 14

_The Present_

-and opened them, fixing Lance with a furious glare. No. If it was Voltron that was the intruders... Keith swung at him again, only for Lance to block it with his shield. He was going to kill him.

Zarkon would be pleased.

”Damn it!” Lance grit his teeth, raising his rifle. “Keith. Seriously. I do not want to shoot you.”

”You left me to die,” Keith growled. “Just returning the fucking favor.”

Lance blinked in confusion, lowering his gun. “What the hell are you talking about?”

In that moment, Keith struck again, and Lance dodged, swearing. That was when Keith saw the crumpled Galra figure, hand outstretched. For a moment, his heart stopped, thinking he saw a familiar dress. But no, Zornia wouldn’t be here. It was just one of his guards. Keith glared at Lance, shifting his weight. The Blue Paladin had hurt - killed one of his guards.

Keith sent a thankful word that Zarkon had seen fit to return his bayard to him and pointed it at Lance. “If that had been Zornia, I would have your head,” he told him, his voice rumbling in anger. “Still might. You abandoned me. Left me to die.”

”Who the hell is Zornia?” Lance just shook his head. “Keith, buddy, I don’t know what you’ve been told, but we didn’t abandon you.”

”Liar!” The sword came down again, trying to take Lance off guard. But somehow, Lance kept blocking him or dodging. “You... Goddamn... liar...”

And then, suddenly, Lance was in his personal space, grabbing his arm and twisting it until he dropped his sword. “I’m not lying,” he told him, his voice intense. “Keith, we would never abandon you.”

Keith snarled in his face. “Bullshit.”

”What’s it going to take for you to believe me?!” Lance yelled in his face. “What the hell have you been told, Keith?!”

”The fucking truth!” He shifted, managing to break Lance’s grip and kick him away. The two of them stared at each other, panting. “I saw how far away you were,” he hissed. “When Zarkon showed it to me. You had left me and ran.”

”Zar- holy shit, what the fuck has Zarkon been telling you?” Lance’s mouth dropped open. “Dude, whatever it is, it’s not true. Look, let’s just go back to the Castleship and get you... dressed. Aren’t you cold?”

”Don’t change the subject.” He hadn’t thought about his lack of dress in a long time. But he was a pet. These were his clothes.

Lance threw up his hands. “Keith, look, whatever you’ve been told isn’t true. Now let’s _go._ Allura just found Red and said she can pilot her. We’ll get you back, get you dressed, and catch you up. We have a lot of stories while we were looking for-” He broke off, dodging as Keith’s foot came up to meet his face. Lance sighed, a look coming over his face. “I don’t want to hurt you, Keith.”

”Fine. Because I’m going to kill you.” With that, Keith rushed him again, fist flying in for a punch.

Lance shifted, grabbing his arm, twisting him. Before Keith knew it, Lance’s forearm pressed against his throat, and he gasped for air. “Didn’t want to use Shiro’s training for this,” he heard Lance mutter as he held Keith’s arm and throat tighter. “I’m sorry.”

Just as he blacked out, Lance let him go. The last thing he heard was Lance’s voice.

”Yeah. I’m here. I... found Keith.”

_End Part 1_


	15. Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little background: When I had first come up with this idea, I had been listening to [Divide](http://rwby.wikia.com/wiki/Divide) from the RWBY volume 3 soundtrack. I had been suddenly struck by how much it could be Zarkon talking to Allura. And then I started to wonder how he would have planted the seeds of doubt and divided them and oh look brainwash Keith. But the reason why I say this is because pretty much Divide is the song for this chapter.

His pet was missing.

Zarkon frowned, staring at the room devoid of the former Red Paladin. He had put so much work into that pet. A stroke of luck that he had been caught. A stroke of luck his soldiers had remembered his ship was supposed to come through that airspace, and hailed it, telling him of their find. A stroke of luck they hadn’t _killed_ him. He had the one that had gutted the Paladin tortured and killed for that.

But then, oh then... it was too easy. He hadn’t realized until then that the Paladins were _children._ Little kittens that were playing in a war. They had no idea what they had signed up for. The Paladins were no longer a force, but kittens to be pulled to his side with pretty words. Children to break.

It had been so easy at first. Telling the child he might be killed that night, and then letting the guard have the night off... the soldiers did what was natural to them. Showing him the image of space had been a little harder; he had to capture the perfect moment when their ships were far enough away before his friends finished licking their wounds and jumped through space to them. Another stroke of luck there, that he had managed to transport the child onto his ship and move on when he did. It wasn’t long after that he heard reports of the Paladins of Voltron attacking that ship, most likely looking for their comrade and their Lion.

But the child didn’t need to know that, did he?

No, he only needed to be his pet. Sit prettily at his feet, do as he said. He needed to show the Galra empire that the Paladins of Voltron were mere children, playthings of Emperor Zarkon himself.

Twisting the child’s head around had been _so_ much fun. He almost could see the moment he believed the Princess had lied to him. While it was true they were in a war they couldn’t beat, Zarkon was certain the Princess had been quite truthful to them. As much so as she knew, that was.

And the moment he knew he would no longer have to punish him for disobedience... the moment he knew that his pet had given in... ah, that had been a sweet moment to see him give up control to him. Every night since that moment, watching his too small body bleed around him as he relinquished control... Zarkon shook his head. It had been over too quickly.

He turned to leave, and caught sight of a servant woman just outside the door. Ah, the personal servant he had assigned his pet. Her duties were simple: feed him and bring him to Zarkon when requested. If needed, bring him to be punished. But... he schooled his face into blankness as he heard her growling slightly under her breath. He had known the two of them had grown closer than he intended. Something had happened between them that had broken her animosity towards his pet.

He should have had her killed before then.

Outside bonds would have given him thoughts. He wouldn’t be completely reliant on Zarkon for emotional support. Perhaps, even, this woman would have been sympathetic towards his pet and tried to help him escape. No, he should have fabricated a reason for her to be killed and forced his pet to take her head with his bayard.

Ah, but enough of that. She could keep her head now. His pet was gone. Stolen by the Paladins that had boarded his ship.

He wondered if they thought they had rescued their comrade. That everything would be fine now.

They didn’t realize that he had already won. No matter what, he owned his pet, mind, body, and soul. His pet would have distrust of them, and may even try to come back to him. An amusing thought occurred to him that maybe his pet might even try to kill them. But he had already divided them. They would be forced to find a new Red Paladin, as this one... would no longer do. Not at all.

And he was going to take back what was his.

And maybe also his pet, if they hadn’t ruined him too much.

If they had, well... bad pets had to be put down.

Zarkon made his way back to his room, a cruel smile on his face. Yes... hopefully they hadn’t ruined him. He did want his pet back.

But first... his Lion.

Regain what was _his._

No upstart Princess or little kittens were going to keep him from it.


	16. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Begin Part 2
> 
> I originally wasn't going to delve back into the past until infiniterhapsody said something that made me think hm, that's a good idea. So now we're seeing some events that Keith didn't see, how the rest of Voltron got to where they are now.
> 
> This would have been up earlier, but my body decided it wanted to give me the headache from Hell that made me nauseous. So it took a while for me to even get the urge to get out of bed, much less look at this.

_The Past_

The world had no sound. Lance blinked, trying to figure out what was wrong. He couldn’t... hear anything. And he hurt all over. Something had happened. He tried to sit up, his head throbbing as he did. What had... happened? Why couldn’t he remember?

Finally, Lance managed to sit upright as he felt a hand on his arm, pulling him up. He grunted and tried to stand, falling into whoever was pulling him up. Blearily, he looked up, knowing it was Shiro only by the black and white. Everything was too blurry. And no sound. Still no sound. He coughed, and the feeling was... wet. Very wet. And now there was red on that white in his vision.

Everything _hurt_.

Shiro’s hand cupped his chin, forcing him to look up at him. His lips were moving - damn it, he couldn’t see - then frowned when Lance didn’t answer. Lance could see his eyes shifting away, his lips moving again to probably talk to the others. Then he frowned, looking around.

He could barely hear a sound when Shiro’s voice raised to a yell.

Lance’s eyes started to slide close again when Shiro draped Lance’s arm over his neck, supporting him. It was dizzying to try and pay attention when nothing wanted to play nice. He started to lead him away, moving a little too quickly than he wanted. It made things hurt worse, made him cough up that wetness, made him just a little more dizzy.

It wasn’t under they reached where Blue was hiding that Lance started to fight back a little.

”Keith.” Oh wow, he knew he had said something, but he could barely hear it. There was something about Keith...

And then he was coughing again and now he could see that was blood that was coming up.

Shiro shook his head, helping him into the pilot’s seat and strapping him in. He leaned in close enough that Lance could smell what toothpaste he used and spoke in loud tones, but he still couldn’t understand it. Once he was done, Shiro left and Blue sealed him instead, and Lance ran a hand over the controls. Something was wrong, and he had to get back.

”Don’t lead me wrong,” he tried to say as he wrapped his hands around the sticks. “Let’s go, girl.”

Lance dumped all his trust into his Lion and closed his eyes, trusting her to help him back to the Castle. Back to the cryopods.

And hopefully everyone else would be there too.

* * *

Lance could go his entire _lifetime_ without having another concussion, burst eardrum, and somehow bruising his lungs to the point he started to cough up blood (Coran had a special word for it he said the last time it happened but he was not the medical specialist so it went right over his head). All of that had sucked, especially when he finally got out of the pod and everything was suddenly too loud. Ugh. Keith was going to laugh at him for the way he fell on his ass.

Whatever. Get dressed first, then eat. That would be-

”Lance.”

Shiro. Lance slowly stood up, trying to save some face as he brushed off his legs. “Hey there,” he said nonchalantly. “What’s up?”

Why was Shiro still in his flight suit? “Lance,” he said slowly, looking as if he was searching for the right words. “When I found you... Keith had been looking for you to help, correct?”

”Yeah...” Lance blinked, not quite getting it. “Why? Is Keith bitching about something?”

He could feel his heart start to sink as Shiro shook his head. “We couldn’t find him and he wasn’t responding to any of us,” he said. “I couldn’t return to the room you two had been in. Too many guards and soldiers. We had to retreat.”

”WHAT?!” Lance’s hands balled into fists at that. “The hell you did! You-”

Shiro looked up at him, his eyes haunted. “I tried, Lance,” he told him softly. “Pidge and Hunk tried-” He broke off, his gaze sliding to another pod and oh shit. There were two more pods around, housing Pidge and Hunk. “We _tried_ ,” he finally said, his voice broken.

Lance swallowed. “We need to go back,” he managed to get out. “We can’t just-”

”I know that!” Shiro put a hand to his head, steadying himself. “I know, Lance. We’re going to. I just... couldn’t watch my entire team die on me.”

He couldn’t stop staring at Pidge and Hunk. While he couldn’t remember what had happened (he never had amnesia for the traumatic events he wanted it for), he knew... Keith had been there. And if it had hurt him, Keith was hurt too.

Keith was hurt and in Galra hands.

They needed to go back, _now._

Lance closed his eyes.

”Shiro, we need to go back.”

”We need to wait until Hunk and Pidge are out.” Shiro didn’t look like he enjoyed saying that. “We’re going to need all of us to get Keith back.”

Yeah. He understood that. Didn’t mean he liked it.

Lance just nodded, eyes still closed.

Damn it.

Tears prickled at his eyes, and he felt Shiro pull him into a hug. When he opened his eyes slightly, he could still see a smear of red against the white of his armor.

Damn it.


	17. Chapter 17

”He’s not superhuman, Pidge!” Hunk had an arm out, holding her angry form back. “He couldn’t do it alone!”

Well, telling them that they had to leave Keith there because everyone was dying didn’t go well. Lance didn’t feel like he could begrudge Pidge too much, though. Leaving anyone behind made him twitch, and he had a feeling everyone was doubly on edge because it was Keith. Watching him awkwardly bond with all of them was kind of endearing. Yeah, he still called him his ‘rival,’ but that was because it was his way of bonding with him. Not to mention Pidge and Keith seemed to have become fast friends out here. So he could see why Pidge was particularly angry.

Shiro sagged a little, a look of defeat crossing his face. It hurt so much to see. Lance swallowed, wanting to wipe it away, to tell him it was okay, he understood. But he also didn’t, he was so angry that Keith was left behind. He couldn’t say anything but watch Pidge grip Hunk’s arm, her teeth grit hard against the words she wanted to say.

”Then we go back,” she finally said, her voice cold. “We go back now and get him.”

”Pidge...”

”We go back!” she shouted over Shiro. “We get in our Lions and go back! Keith...” Her nails dug into Hunk’s arm as she looked down. “We need to get Keith.”

”I agree,” Lance told him. “We need to go back and get him.”

That just made Shiro close his eyes. “I know,” he said, his voice broken. “But we _can’t._ While you three were in stasis, Allura and I were monitoring the airspace. There’s a new ship, and the fighters patrolling have quintupled. You remember the trouble we had when we had Voltron. We can’t make it if there’s just the four of us.”

” _Bullshit_!” Pidge’s voice turned shrill as Hunk had to hold her back again. “You just don’t want to!”

”Pidge!” Hunk gasped.

”It’s true! He just doesn’t want to go back!”

They all knew it wasn’t true. They all knew Shiro felt the brunt of this guilt. He always did. But... right now, Lance couldn’t help but turn an angry eye on Shiro as well. He had such respect for the guy, such... and now he wasn’t going to go help one of his teammates?

”I don’t want to lose all of you.” Shiro’s voice was soft, but it cut across all of Pidge’s screams. “Leaving Keith behind is bad enough. I don’t want to watch all of you die trying to get him back.”

That made them all quiet and look away.

”Then what do we do?” Lance finally asked, turning his gaze back to the rest. “We can’t just leave him there.”

”We’re not.” Everyone looked over at Shiro as his jaw set. “We’re going to get him back.”

They all nodded, resolute. They were going to get him back.

Just... how?

* * *

”Pidge, eventually all this space coffee’s going to give out on you and you’re going to crash.”

”Shut up and give me my coffee,” she snapped at Lance, holding one hand out, the other still typing. She hadn’t been sleeping at all since they all had learned they had to leave Keith behind, trying to see if she could extend the length of her invisibility field. So far, no dice.

Lance sat down next to her, giving her the mug. “... we’re going to need you too, you know.”

”And right now, our best bet is to sneak in,” she shot back. “So let me work.”

Lance just held up his hands and let her be, standing and leaving.

He didn’t really blame her. Tensions were high all around. Trying to figure out how to get Keith back had run them all into brick walls, and none of them could take another moment without him. No one had mentioned leaving him behind for good, but he could see the thought crossing Allura’s face at times before being crushed with a guilty cast to her features after.

They had to get him back.

Lance started back to his room, intent on listening to some music to calm down. Shiro was probably training. Hunk was either messing with something or baking. Who knew. He took solace in both activities. Probably messing with something; Lance wasn’t smelling delicious cookies. Now that he thought about it, that made sense. Probably getting ready for the rescue.

And what was Lance going to do? Listen to some music? He started swearing softly under his breath in Spanish, feeling useless. He could be training, getting better so he could kick Galra ass. Or just doing something other than sitting around like a lump. But the training room was Shiro’s territory and he couldn’t just barge in like that, Shiro would be...

Lance sighed.

He had to let that _go._ It was okay to go down there. Shiro might even enjoy having someone to face off against.

So when Lance got back to his room, he changed into workout clothes and headed down to the training room.

* * *

They were going to get Keith back.

Lance stared up at the ceiling as he laid in bed, music playing in his ears.

They were going to get him back.

No matter what.


	18. Chapter 18

Fingers flew over the keyboard as Pidge frowned at the screen. It just wasn’t working. She couldn’t make the cloak extend the way she wanted to. No matter how much she toyed with the code, it didn’t work. She made a growling noise in the back of her throat as she leaned back, staring at the lines of code. Keith depended on her! She- she needed to-

The code started to blur, and she closed her eyes. No, she couldn’t get emotional about this. She was right - Keith depended on her. He depended on all of them. So she needed to get her ass in gear and get this done.

Clearing her throat, Pidge opened her eyes and started working on her code again. She could do this.

Someone sat down next to her, but she paid it no mind. The code had to be done first. Everything else came second.

”Shiro wants to talk to us,” Hunk told her softly.

”I’m not done.” Her voice came out short, clipped.

”I know. But it seems really important.”

”We’re not getting in there without this. I need to-”

”Pidge.” One of his hands covered hers, and she swallowed. “It’s important.”

Balling up her hands, Pidge nodded. “Fine.” She saved her work quickly and set her laptop aside, standing and following Hunk. If it was important enough to interrupt her, she guessed she could go.

The rest of them were on the deck, and Pidge immediately saw why it was important. The display of the airspace surrounding the two ships showed only one now, and a drastic decrease in fighters. One of the ships had taken off for some reason. She looked over at Shiro, her heart in her throat, hoping he was about to say what she wanted him to say.

Lance grinned, bouncing on his heels. “So that means we can go rescue Keith, right?” he asked before Shiro could open his mouth.

Pidge felt a scream of joy build in her throat as Shiro nodded. “Then what are we waiting for?” she demanded, looking at all of them. “Let’s go!”

”We should exercise caution,” Shiro started to say before Lance cut him off.

”Screw caution! Let’s go get Keith back!”

”Yeah!” Pidge chimed in. “Fuck caution!”

”Shiro might have a point.” Hunk put a hand up as Lance and Pidge turned to him. “I mean, we had a lot of trouble getting to the ship as Voltron. It’s going to be a lot harder as just the four of us.”

Pidge looked away. Damn it. He was right. But she wasn’t leaving Keith there. She wasn’t losing anyone else.

Finally, Shiro sighed. “Suit up,” he said, to Pidge’s delight. “You’re right. We need to get Keith.”

Everyone nodded. Hunk looked uneasy, but determined. They all knew this was the only way. They had to get him back.

Pidge swallowed. They had to.

* * *

Good thing about going back to a ship they had already infiltrated was they already knew where the prisoner cells were.

Bad thing about going back to a ship they had already infiltrated was the enemy knew their plans of attack.

”This isn’t working,” Pidge said grimly as she and Lance took cover around a corner.

”Nah, you think?” Lance shifted to shoot around the corner at the incoming droid guards. He looked around, then frowned. “Pidge. There. I’ll give you a boost into the vents, and you can make your way down to the cells. You’re tiny enough you can get through them.”

”Yeah, and I’ll be defenseless while I’m up there!” she shot back.

”Have any other ideas?”

She sighed, knowing Shiro and Hunk were even further away. “Give me the boost up.”

Lance holstered his bayard for a moment, going over to the vent and shifting so she could climb on top of him. Taking off the vent cover was a little tricky, but it clattered off after a moment, and Pidge pulled herself into the vent. Without waiting, she started crawling, bringing up a mental map of where she was in relation to where the prisoner cells were.

It was soon obvious that the ventilation system was a mess. Several times, she was certain she was lost. When she was about to give up and leave the vents, she finally looked out and saw a familiar sight. She was close to the prisoner cells. Keep crawling.

Finally, she made it. There were a few guards, but nothing she couldn’t handle with her bayard. Still, she waited until there was only one around, then kicked the vent covering down and jumped out. Before the guard droid could even turn around, she zapped it, quickly turning to tangle the incoming one up. She zapped the last one, and stood, going to each cell.

Good thing was there hadn’t been enough time since they had last been there for any of the cells to be filled, so checking them took no time. But each empty cell made her heart sink, and finally she came to a closed, windowless cell. Isolated. She pulled out her data pad, her heart in her throat as she hacked into the lock. It might take Galra input, but she had the fact she had been practicing her hacking of Galra tech on her side. The door opened, and she bounded in. “Keith, we’re-”

Empty.

”Pidge! Pidge, is something wrong?”

Instead of answering, she looked around. There, just outside the room. It wasn’t pointing in, but the camera was pointed at the door. Pidge went over to it, studying the wires, ignoring Shiro’s voice in her ear as she yanked one out, attaching it to her data pad. With a few taps, it started to download what the camera had seen.

Damn it.

They had been so close...

When it was done downloading, she disconnected and stashed the data pad, making her way out. She couldn’t hike herself back into the vents without help, but she should be able to take the guards by surprise by coming up behind them. “Keith’s not here,” she said testily. “Coming back to you guys.”

”Fuck!”

Really, she should have known Shiro knew that word. He had been a student at the Garrison as well. It just took her by surprise to hear it burst explosively over her com link from him. But no one called him out on it, probably because they were all thinking the exact same thing.

Fuck.

* * *

”Found anything yet?”

Lance sat down next to her, passing over a cup of coffee. She took it, shaking her head. “I’m almost at the time when we found out the other ship had gone.”

He just sat next to her, silent. Pidge let him, watching the footage zip backwards. They had been so stupid, waiting so long. So useless, taking so long to get to him. And she might not have even gotten the right footage, or they might not have even locked him up-

Lance inhaled sharply as two Galra came into view, the backward footage showing them carrying something. Pidge paused it, reversing it so it played normally, at normal speeds, and felt her heart die.

”That’s Keith, isn’t it,” Lance whispered.

They were carrying a limp Keith.

”They didn’t- they-”

Instead of answering, Pidge played the video backwards again. This time, she paused it when another figure came out of the room, her hands shaking.

They all recognized him. Allura made sure they knew who that was.

Zarkon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I make no promises getting a chapter out tomorrow. My anniversary is tomorrow (yeah, I got married on Halloween) and I may not be able to write.
> 
> Happy Halloween!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So apparently what two fanfiction authors do for their anniversary is go out for breakfast, lunch, and then write for the rest of the day.

Shiro gently pulled Pidge off of her laptop, trying not to wake her as he lifted her into his arms. She had been watching the footage she had taken from the ship again, trying to see if she could figure anything out about where Keith could have been taken. Where Zarkon could have ordered him to be taken to, where he could be held now.

He didn’t want to be the one to say that there was a high chance that they had been taking Keith’s body for disposal.

But no, he had to hold onto the hope that Keith was still alive. That Zarkon had plans for him, and they could still find him. He had first hand experience that the Galra played with their prisoners. But even that felt sour in his stomach. Shiro tucked Pidge in her bed, feeling his stomach turn at the thought of Keith having to fight in the same rings that he did. Having to endure the same kind of medical experimentation he couldn’t remember. What would remain of Keith if that happened?

But it would be better than death. Shiro stroked Pidge’s head before leaving. His team made sure that they were always there for him. They could do the same for Keith. No matter what happened, they could be there.

He just couldn’t shake the thought that Keith could possibly be dead. No matter how hard he tried, there was always the nagging thought that their Red Paladin had been killed by Zarkon that day, and was being disposed of.

With an explosive breath, he started down to the training room. He needed to not think for a while. Putting all his brain power into staying alive would do that nicely.

When he got down there, there was already someone training. For a moment, Shiro’s breath caught, the bizarre thought that it might be _Keith_ hitting him before telling himself that those were pulse shots. Rifle shots. Lance.

Shiro just stood on the edge of the training room for a moment, watching him. For all the grief Keith gave him, Lance was actually getting much better. His hand-to-hand was lacking, true, but he had a quick eye and an ever quicker mind. To be honest, Shiro wouldn’t be surprised if Lance could go further than either of them in the training simulation as long as none of the gladiators came close.

But that wasn’t reality, and Lance would have to get better at fighting in close quarters. He already pressed Pidge about it, and he knew he would have to do the same for Lance. Shiro cleared his throat as Lance shot down the last one, making him jump and spin around. A slightly panicked, frightened look was quickly wiped off Lance’s face, fast enough that Shiro wasn’t sure that he had seen it before a huge smile beamed on his lips.

”Hey man! I’ll get out of your way.” Lance deactivated his bayard, starting to leave the room.

”Actually... I was hoping you would stay.” Shiro noticed as Lance’s eyes rounded at that. “I could use a sparring partner, and you could use to work on your hand-to-hand.

Lance groaned. “Aw man. I’m _exhausted._ ”

”And sometimes you’ll be forced to fight while you’re exhausted out in the field.” Shiro nodded to the training floor. “Let’s go.”

”Fiiiiiine.” Lance holstered his bayard, following him out. “Just be nice when you introduce my nose to the floor.”

Shiro laughed. “I’ll remember that.”

* * *

Even on the best of nights, Shiro had a hard time sleeping. On nights when it hit him that it had been three months. Three months since they had lost Keith, that they had raided every Galra vessel they had come across in the hopes their missing teammate was being held there...

That had him standing on the bridge, watching stars pass by as they flew.

Three months.

None of the others had given up hope. He could still see it when they boarded a new ship. Pidge immediately went to the prisoner cells, and her terse “no Keith” would haunt them all for days after.

And all Shiro could think of was Keith’s limp body being carried from his cell.

”Shiro.” Allura came up beside him, also staring at the stars. “So you were unable to sleep as well.”

He sighed. “That seems to be more and more common these days.”

Allura didn’t respond to that. Instead, she just stared at the passing space, her gaze thoughtful. “Shiro, do you still hold hope Keith is still out there?” she finally asked, not looking at him.

Shiro understood what she was asking. It was a cold blooded question sheathed in concern. “I have to,” he told her quietly. “But I also know he’s probably dead.”

Her gaze turned to him, troubled. “We have to hope he’s out there, don’t we?” she asked, her voice uneasy. “But if he’s not, we’re losing time we could be looking for a new Red Paladin.”

There it was. Shiro knew that was a concern he would have to address as well. “We can’t think of that until we have the Red Lion back,” he told her. “And hopefully, Keith’s being held in the same place.”

”And if he is not?”

Shiro closed his eyes.

”Then we look for a new Red Paladin.”

* * *

No. He did not want to know where Lance got the alcohol. He wasn’t going to police that. If Lance was old enough to die for the universe, he was old enough to regret all the alcohol he had drank in the morning.

Though he suspected Pidge had something to do with it. Which- no. She also was old enough to die for the universe. He wasn’t here to police them. Just remind them that if they tried to fly while drunk they might get them all killed.

In the meantime, Shiro pressed a cup of water into Lance’s hands, hoping he wasn’t too far gone that he would be vomiting this back up. “Here. Drink this. _Slowly._ ”

Obediently, Lance took a sip. “Thanks,” he slurred, looking down at the cup. “You know, you’re always there for me. For us. For... all of us, even when we don’t deserve it.”

Oh boy. Shiro sat down next to him on Lance’s bed, placing a hand on his knee. “Hey. What’s wrong?”

”Just-” Lance tipped into him, smashing his face into his shoulder. “You’re too good to us,” he mumbled.

”Lance...”

”We all know Keith’s dead. It’s been six months. Pidge... Hunk... we all were talking about it tonight. We were too late. We-” Lance’s breath started to hitch. “And you’re still looking for him like he’s still there,” he whimpered. “You’re not giving up hope.”

Shiro shifting, moving the hand on his knee to wrap around Lance’s skinny form. “Hey. It’s okay.”

”Keith is _dead._ How can you say it’s okay?”

”We haven’t found the Red Lion yet,” he told him. “Just... hold out hope until we find the Red Lion.”

Lance went silent for a few moments, then nodded. “Okay,” he whispered. “Okay.”

Shiro hugged him with one arm tightly, then let him go. “Drink your water. Do you think you’ll need a wastebasket?”

”For what?” Lance looked up at him, blinking.

”In case you throw up in the middle of the night,” Shiro told him patiently. “You’re rather drunk.”

”Oh.” Lance looked down at his water. “Yeah.”

Shiro pulled his wastebasket closer to him, and messed up his hair. “Sleep well, Lance.”

Lance scowled, using one hand to put his hair back into place. Then, he just nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.”

When the door slide shut behind Shiro, making sure that Lance couldn’t see him, he wiped at his face only for more tears to flow from his eyes.

They all knew Keith was dead. But he had to hold out hope they were wrong. Just for a little longer.

* * *

”Hey Lance? You there, buddy? You’ve been talking really weirdly.”

Shiro finally dispatched the last of his guard droids, ready to listen in. What the Hell was Lance doing now?

”Yeah. I’m here. I... found Keith.”


	20. Chapter 20

Lance had refused to tell them what Keith had said to him or why he had choked him out. That worried Shiro. Something was wrong with Keith.

Whatever it was, any part of it that was physical could be taken care of by the cryopod. Shiro looked up at Keith’s peaceful face as he laid in the pod, not feeling right. He had seen the scars. The one on Keith’s cheek stood out even now. What had Zarkon done to him?

”Coran.” He heard Lance come up behind him, his voice quiet. “How’s Keith doing?”

”Well, now...” Coran’s voice was hesitant, making Shiro tense. “If we compare his last stay in the cryopod to now... it shows he’s had quite a few broken bones, mostly around his arms and hands. It appears his hands have been broken multiple times. The scars on his cheek, shoulder, and stomach are... deep.” Coran’s voice faltered here. “Very deep. The one on his cheek is at least to bone, and the one on his stomach appears to have almost reached his internal organs.”

Shiro swallowed. He didn’t remember it very well, but there was a memory of intense pain, then violating healing. A healing that touched a core he didn’t know existed. If those cuts had truly been that deep, he would have required that healing. It would be the only way he would be alive right now.

”And... there appears to be anal tearing. It appears it’s happened multiple times, and while there is recent tearing, it appears this has been going on for a bit.”

Shiro’s breath stopped.

”So he was raped.” Lance’s voice sounded... wrong. Shiro turned to him, taken aback by the look on his face. The normally vivacious Lance’s face was blank. “Make sense,” he continued, his voice toneless.

”Lance, what do you mean?” Shiro asked. This wasn’t like Lance. What did he know?

For a moment, Lance just stared at Keith. Then he shook his head. “Nothing. I just really hate rapists.”

”Lance.”

”Just... when he gets out, make sure you restrain him or something.” Lance swallowed, looking away. “He’s going to attack us. Or try to get away.”

”If you know something, Lance, tell me. We can’t start helping him unless we know what you do.”

Lance shook his head again. “Just do what I say, okay? I know what I’m talking about.”

Shiro sighed. “Fine. But you will explain what it is you’re talking about at some point.”

There was a moment, then Lance deflated. “Keith started to believe Zarkon,” he finally said, his voice hesitant as if searching for the right words.

But just what he said made Shiro’s blood run cold. His gaze snapped back to Keith’s still form, trying to figure out how he could have started to believe what their enemy said. “Are you sure?”

”Yeah.”

Shiro looked over at Lance, studying him. He knew more than he was letting on. What was it? What did he know? “I’ll remain here,” he finally said. “And Coran-” here, Coran jumped slightly, not expecting to be addressed- “could you get me some restraints? Handcuffs of some sort?”

”Yes, of course.” Coran bowed slightly, leaving to find said restraints.

Shiro expected Lance to say something, or to leave, but instead he just stood there, studying Keith. His face was... sad, Shiro realized. It made him look much, much older than usual.

”Lance, you can always talk to me,” Shiro told him gently. “About whatever’s bothering you.”

”This isn’t something I want to talk about,” Lance snapped out, harsh. Then he took a deep steadying breath. “I really hate people like Zarkon, okay? That’s all.”

It wasn’t all, but Shiro had a feeling that was all he was getting. “You don’t need to stay here,” he said instead. “Get some rest.”

Lance rubbed one eye, smiling humorlessly. “You’re probably right in that I need rest,” he told him. “But I think I should be here when Keith gets out.”

”I’ll be here. Don’t worry about it.”

Lance opened his mouth, then shut it. “Fiiiiine.” He stretched, obviously trying to bring back a semblance of his normal behavior. “Just let the rest of us know when he’s out, then.”

”I will. Go rest.”

With a wave, Lance turned and left.

Leaving Shiro to look back at Keith, worried. Keith was starting to believe what Zarkon said. Zarkon had done something to Keith that made Lance think he was a threat once he got out of the cryopod. What did Zarkon tell him? Why would Keith be a threat?

They could keep him asleep for a little longer, let the cryopod heal what little damage was left by the repeated fractures and repeated healings while they planned what to do from there. Shiro touched his Galra arm. Sometimes, he remembered a deep ache in the arm, a crunch of bone. But it was always gone before he could truly remember. Just... that after that crunch, it always hurt.

Even now, the missing limb hurt.

He closed his eyes. Shiro had known that if Keith was alive, he would have suffered at the hands of the Galra. But how much... he hadn’t expected to hear that he might have been cut deeply enough to be considered _gutted._ He hadn’t expected to hear that he had started to believe in his enemy.

Shiro opened his eyes again, staring at Keith’s face.

”I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I should have been there. I should have gotten you.”

”Shiro.” He turned at Coran’s voice. “Here are the restraints you asked for.” Coran handed him a pair of handcuffs, worry in his face. “Will you be needing anything else?”

He considered the question for a moment. “Tell Allura we need somewhere to hold Keith,” Shiro finally said. “Some kind of cell. He might... be dangerous.”

”We have holding cells that can be used. I will lead you there once our Red Paladin awakens.”

Shiro didn’t answer to that.

There was a feeling that Keith may not be their Red Paladin anymore.


	21. Chapter 21

Peaceful.

Everything was... peaceful.

He didn’t want to wake up.

But he opened his eyes, the world somewhat familiar yet not.

Then a door was lifting off him and he was tipped out, legs stumbling. Someone caught him, arms strong and familiar. The grip on him wasn’t steadying, but almost restraining. Close to painful. Keith looked up, up at the scar across the nose and the white bangs.

For a moment, he looked at Shiro, his body lax in his arms as his mind worked. Waking up. As he stared up, Shiro relaxed slightly, smiling and slowly releasing him. “Keith-”

The moment Shiro said his name, Keith wrenched one arm from his grip, using all his strength to backhand Shiro. Stunned, Shiro let him go, stumbling back. Keith took that opportunity and rushed him, tackling. Normally, Shiro would brace himself, and Keith would only be able to push him back perhaps a few centimeters.

But taken off guard like this, Shiro fell with him.

Keith instantly threw his leg over Shiro’s body, straddling him as his hands wrapped around Shiro’s throat. He was aware of the growls and snarls coming from his mouth, but they didn’t matter. Shiro was always supposed to be there for him. And then he ran away, leaving him to die. Keith tightened his grip, watching Shiro choke. This was too good for him.

Something solid and _hard_ hit the side of his head, making his vision black out for a second as his hands released, his body tipping over. He could feel Shiro pushing him off, coughing. Keith looked up as his vision cleared, seeing Shiro rolling to his hands and knees, still coughing, a pair of what appeared to be Altean handcuffs on his belt.

Without needing to see more, Keith grabbed the cuffs and Shiro’s human hand, wrenching it back and making him fall onto his side. Thankfully, looping the cuff around his hand and locking it wasn’t hard, and he was able to do the same to the Galra arm as well.

Then, Keith started to run out of the room, scrambling to his feet. He needed a weapon. His bayard. Something. He got lucky with Shiro. When he got out of the cuffs, that luck was going away. He needed to level the field.

A part of him whispered no, stop, but he ignored it. These assholes had left him to die. If it hadn’t been for Zarkon, he would have died. They deserved everything Keith would do to them.

Another part of him whispered he was outnumbered. Best to just return to Zarkon. Best to return to being a pet.

He ignored that part too.

They deserved to die.

And there was nothing around. He could go back to his room, but his dagger was even missing. Still with Zarkon, probably. Keith paused for a moment, thinking. Where- there had to be-

He stilled as Lance’s rifle dug into his skull. “Don’t move,” he heard Lance say steadily.

Keith didn’t.

”Get on the ground. Hands out.”

Okay, that he wasn’t going to do.

”Keith, I swear to God, I don’t want to hurt you.”

”You just want to finish the job, right?” he hissed. “After all, leaving me there didn’t kill me.”

”Zarkon’s wrong. We nearly died trying to get to you.”

Keith just laughed at that. “Bullshit,” he said around the wild laughter. “I wasn’t that far away from you!”

”I had a fucking concussion, busted eardrums, and was coughing up blood!”

Lance’s rifle shifted away, just slightly.

That’s all Keith needed to turn, one arm knocking the rifle away, the other twisting around his body to belt Lance across the face. Lance stumbled back, and Keith followed, wrenching his bayard out of his hands and tossing it aside. The Blue Bayard wouldn’t work for him anyway. Lance tried to punch him, pulled his arm back and let it fly, but Keith easily shifted away, his own fist coming in firmly under the ribs, driving all the breath out of Lance.

Large hands grabbed him, yanking him back and face down on the ground. Keith tried to get up, shove the hands off, but too much weight was being pressed down onto him.

”Thanks, Hunk,” he heard Lance rasp. “Pidge, go check to see if Shiro’s okay.”

Lighter footsteps ran - Pidge - leaving him alone with Hunk and Lance. Keith shifted, waiting for Lance to regain his bayard. To shove the rifle against his head and just end it.

He wasn’t the Red Paladin anymore. He belonged to Zarkon, Zarkon’s pet. Why would they even trust him to live?

But Lance didn’t. Hunk didn’t try to hurt him, just held him down. Used his weight to keep Keith from rising, from moving. Finally, he heard footsteps again - Shiro and Pidge. It was obviously Pidge from the lighter footfalls, and the heavier ones had to be Shiro. That was confirmed when Shiro bent down beside him. “Keith, why?”

”You left me there to die,” he growled, shifting again under Hunk’s hold. “Just returning the fucking favor.”

He knew he hit truth when he heard Pidge inhale sharply and felt Hunk’s hands tighten.

Shiro was quiet for a moment, then rose. The sensation of the Altean cuffs were... odd, but they were very secure once Shiro tightened them on his wrists. So that was how they were going to do it. Hunk let him go, and Keith tried to get to his feet, tried to run, but Lance instantly put out his hand and pushed him down, his face empty.

So this was how he would die.

Shiro grabbed his arm and forced him up. “Come on.”

”Going to take me somewhere special?” he hissed at Shiro. “Somewhere that Allura and Coran can see you kill me too, somewhere with cameras?”

”We’re not going to fucking kill you!”

”Pidge. Don’t. He’s not going to listen.”

”Fuck you, Lance!”

Shiro led him away from the bickering. The grip on his arm was too tight to rip out, forcing him to be led down to a place he had never been before. To... Keith stiffened. He didn’t know they had prisoner cells.

”Just for now,” he heard Shiro said, his voice damningly gentle. “Keith... I’m sorry.”

Then he was pushed into the cell, the door locking behind him.


	22. Chapter 22

Pidge kept glaring at Lance and Hunk. While he wanted to admonish her for it, Shiro felt a little like staring at them too. Whatever had just happened had the two of them off in a corner, talking. He couldn’t see Lance’s face; Hunk’s body completely hid Lance from the rest of them.

What did Lance know? Had he come from a broken home? Had he seen this first hand? If he had, he needed to tell them everything. Even the littlest thing would help them with Keith. But Lance was keeping it close to the chest for some reason, and Hunk was enabling this behavior. Why?

It was troubling, to say the least.

Finally, the two of them came over to the rest of them. Lance had his hands in his pockets, not looking at any of them. Shiro waited for a moment, hoping they would say something, but when nothing was forthcoming, turned to include Pidge as he spoke up. “Something’s wrong with Keith.”

Pidge snorted. “No shit.”

”We need to figure out what it is, and how to fix it. He thinks we abandoned him-”

”Because we fucking did!” The words exploded from Pidge in a geyser of guilt. “Do you remember how long we waited? We waited until Zarkon got his claws on him and dragged him away! And then we didn’t find him for _six fucking months_! I call that abandonment!”

”Pidge-”

”We should have gone back as soon as we were out of the cryopods.”

”We would have died!” Hunk protested.

”Or maybe we’d have a non-brainwashed Keith!” she retorted. “You know, someone that doesn’t think Zarkon hung the fucking moon.”

A soft, bitter laugh interrupted them, and they all looked over at Lance. “Zarkon did it on purpose,” he said, his voice pitched quietly. “We would have died. When you look back on it, it’s pretty fucking obvious. He knew they had Keith. He wanted to make sure we would stay away or die trying to get to him. He wanted to isolate him.”

”How the hell do you know that?” Pidge demanded. “Are you some kind of Zarkon expert?”

”No.” He didn’t look at her.

”Pidge, don’t push it.” Hunk held out an arm as Pidge stepped forward, her face a mask of rage. “Just... don’t.”

Shiro cleared his throat. “But it is obvious you know something, Lance,” he said, making Lance stiffen. “Whatever it is, it might be helpful. If you knew someone that went through something like this- we can’t blame each other. Not if we’re going to try to help Keith. But we _can_ share what we know.”

Lance didn’t look at him.

Hunk lowered his arm as Pidge settled back, looking uncomfortable. He looked over at Lance, who just nodded. “We... knew someone in flight school,” he started, carefully. “It’s kind of a similar situation.”

Shiro considered what Hunk just said. So whatever it was, it was someone Lance just knew. Perhaps an old girlfriend he had helped?

”Had a boyfriend. We all thought the boyfriend was great until we stopped... well, seeing the person much. And the person changed too. Started seeing bruises. Still thought the boyfriend was the best person in the world.” Hunk rubbed the back of his head. “We had to force that person to see what he was doing.”

”They thought the boyfriend was right and everyone else was a moron or just seeing things,” Lance finally spoke up. “Boyfriend had them wrapped around his finger. Kinda like how Zarkon has Keith wrapped around his.”

Pieces started to fit together in Shiro’s brain and he felt horrified.

”I see,” he finally said. “But it was possible to make that person finally see the boyfriend was toxic and to leave him?”

”Not before they swore off men forever,” Lance muttered. “And... yeah, that’s it.”

That wasn’t it. But he didn’t want to push it. Not publicly.

”How was it done?”

”Well...” Hunk frowned. “I don’t know if what we did will work here. I mean, an abusive boyfriend is one thing. An evil overlord that wants to kill us is another.”

”I can do it,” Lance said. “I got some ideas.”

Pidge looked at the three of them, then sighed. “Just get him back, I don’t care,” she grumbled.

That seemed to decide it. Pidge strode off, and Hunk and Lance went back to a corner, talking. Shiro considered leaving, to talking to Allura and Coran about their plans, but... he went over to Lance and Hunk. “Lance,” he said quietly. “What can we expect? From Keith.”

Lance closed his mouth, searching Shiro’s face. “Damn it,” he finally whispered.

Hunk rubbed his back as Shiro shook his head. “I know why you don’t want to say anything. But I need to know how Keith will react.”

Lance took a deep breath, tilting his head up at the ceiling before letting it all out. “Other than what he’s already done and try to kill us? He’ll try to escape. Go back to him. We can’t let him.”

”Other than the obvious, why is that?”

The sad, flat, and too knowledgable look on Lance’s face was terrifying. “Because Zarkon will kill him.”


	23. Chapter 23

If they were going to kill him, they better get it over with. He had to pee.

The cuffs had fallen off after a bit. Keith had no idea why; maybe there was a remote to unlock them that Shiro had used. Whatever. Keith rubbed his wrists, looking up at the ceiling.

What were they doing? Why had they just cuffed him and thrown him in a cell? He snorted, pulling his knees to his chest, resting one arm across them. To be true, he’d never seen what it would be like if they took prisoners. He didn’t know if the rest of them were sadistic fucks.

He didn’t know them at all. They were supposed to be the most loyal bunch of idiots in the universe. They were supposed to try to save everyone. And they left him to die.

Keith closed his eyes.

He thought he had known Shiro. Known that at least he would come for him.

”Fuck,” he whispered, his breath ragged.

And this time, there would be no Zarkon to save him. He was at the mercy of whatever they want to do to him. They could carve him into pieces and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Keith shut his eyes tightly, clenching his fist.

He thought he had known them. And then they had left him. What else was he wrong about? Zarkon had mentioned that Allura might have been lying to them. Did... did they know Allura was wrong? Had they figured it out?

Were they still following her if they had?

Keith’s stomach rolled at the thought.

Then he felt like heaving at another thought.

He had mentioned Zornia’s name.

Lance knew about Zornia.

Oh God. If they went back for her...

Keith’s jaw set. He’d kill them before he’d let them touch her.

His first thought was right. He needed to kill them.

The thought kept with him as his head started to bob, eyes closing in drowsiness. He felt so tired. Just... rest his eyes. For a bit.

When his door opened, his eyes snapped open, his head jerking up. Lance was standing there with a plate of something that smelled... familiar. Good. And... clothes. His clothes.

”We figured you might be hankering for some of Hunk’s cooking,” he said, setting both items down. “And you cannot be comfortable in those... whatever they are. You don’t even have underwear on. So here’s your dumb clothes with your dumb gloves and dumb jacket.”

Keith just stared at the plate and clothes. Poisoning would be too... private. They wouldn’t do that. And his clothes- what was Lance doing? He glared at Lance, noting how close the other Paladin was to the door. Probably so he could dash out and shut it if Keith attacked him. Damn.

”The hell are you doing?” he asked instead, his hand flexing.

”Making sure you’re not hungry and that you have some comfortable clothes on. Looks like Zarkon didn’t want you to have the second part, at least.”

”You have no idea what Zarkon wanted,” Keith snapped at him. His clothes were appropriate.

”So why don’t you tell me?” Lance just stood there, arms crossed. “Why did Zarkon put you in something so tight and revealing?”

The words were on the tip of Keith’s brain, ‘because I’m his pet,’ but he couldn’t transfer them to his tongue. He couldn’t just say it to Lance. “You wouldn’t understand,” he finally told him.

”Maybe I want to.” Keith didn’t answer, just looking at the arm crossed over his legs. Lance sighed explosively, but didn’t move. “Fine. Let me ask you another question. Why were you with Zarkon?”

”Because after you left me to die, he saved my life.” The words came out low, angry.

”From what?”

Keith transferred his gaze from his arm to Lance. “You know what.”

”I can guess, but I don’t want to be wrong. You tell me.”

The words hung wrong on Keith’s tongue. “Galra soldiers. They had a Paladin. What do you think they did to me? Zarkon rescued me from that.”

Lance shook his head. “After what happened? Did he come sweeping in and put a stop to it?”

Keith opened his mouth, then closed it.

”Or did he give you an offer you couldn’t refuse?”

”You weren’t there,” he hissed.

Lance held up his hands. “Just saying. He could have just put a stop to it. Or he could have waited until you had no other choice and made you an offer.”

Keith looked away.

After a moment, Lance sighed. “Eat. Get dressed. I missed you, you know.”

”Bullshit.”

”Yeah, even missed that. Somehow. By the way, there's some kind of latrine or something in the corner. Think that's what she called it. If you have to piss or something. Allura let me know it's there.”

When Lance left, Keith just stared at the food and clothes.

Lance just wanted to rattle him. He had no idea what Keith had been through. None at all.

Finally, Keith went over to the food, noting the silverware. He swallowed, fingers brushing over them.

Then started eating with his hands. He was a pet. Pets didn’t use silverware.

Next time he saw Lance, he would tell him that. He would... get over that block that kept him from saying it.

The food was really good. A part of him whispered he had missed this. Hunk had always put the love and care he felt for the team into his cooking.

But-

Did... did he? He didn’t know his team that well, right?

Keith ignored the pile of clothes as he went back to the wall, leaning against it.

Lance was just trying to rattle him. That was all. That was it.

He had to hold onto that.


	24. Chapter 24

His room was _right there._ If he took three more steps, he could fall into bed.

But no, Lance’s legs gave out on him and he fell to the ground. He couldn’t walk any further.

_Keith._ Holy fuck. Memories beat at him, things he wanted so desperately to forget as he closed his eyes tightly. Keith believed so hard that Zarkon had saved him. Had been a good thing for him. Maybe Zarkon had saved his life, but Lance knew it couldn’t have been that simple. He couldn’t have just... that wasn’t how assholes like that worked.

Lance rubbed his jaw, then shook his head, slowly standing. Enough of that. It didn’t help Keith. And they needed him back. Not just as the Red Paladin. That was useful, but they all needed _Keith._ Pidge had been so miserable in the past six months. Shiro... the guilt on his face when he thought no one was looking had been _heartbreaking._

Yeah, they needed Keith back.

Just... he didn’t know if he could do it. He knew how it was done; he better know how it was done. But actually doing it was a completely different thing. It hurt, worse than he thought it would.

Damn it. He couldn’t think like that. Keith depended on him. He needed to put all of that aside and start helping him. They all needed him. Pidge needed her buddy back. Shiro needed whatever their relation was back. Hunk needed his teammate.

Lance needed his rival... his _friend._

They needed Keith.

Lance took a deep breath, looking at the door to his room. Then he shook his head, and started towards Shiro’s room. He wasn’t there, of course. It made sense. If Shiro slept, it was very rarely these days. They practically had to drag him to his room and force him to sleep. After Keith, the guilt... Lance swallowed as he headed to the training room.

With Keith now telling them that he thought they had abandoned him, he was pretty certain Shiro would be here.

Thankfully, he wasn’t wrong. Shiro had just finished up, and was taking a drink of water when Lance walked in. He nodded at Lance, looking him over. “I would say you aren’t here to train,” he said dryly, taking in the hoodie.

”Nah.” Lance stuffed his hands into the pockets, trying to squish the feeling of wrongness. He was okay to be here. “Just wanted to see if you were here.”

Shiro sighed. “As you could probably guess, I couldn’t sleep.”

”I got that. Shiro...” Lance looked away. “You need to sleep.”

”I could say the same for you.” He heard Shiro come close, and he tried not to flinch. God, it had been easier before all this happened. “This must be hard on you, Lance. Are you sure you want to do this alone? Hunk or I could-”

”No.” The word came out short, clipped. “No offense, Shiro, but you’d probably say something like ‘you’ve been abused’ and trust me, that’s the last thing he needs to hear. He won’t listen to you after you say something like that. Not right now.”

Shiro nodded, thinking it over. “Hunk’s helped before,” he said quietly. “He should know what to say.”

”I can’t do that to him again.” Lance felt his heart hurt at just the thought. “Don’t worry about me. I can do this.”

Shiro studied him, raising one hand. Lance did flinch as the hand gently stroked over his cheek despite his efforts. “I’m so sorry.” The guilt in Shiro’s voice was overwhelming, terrible. “If I had known-”

”There’s nothing you can do,” Lance told him, cutting him off. “Anyway, we need to focus on Keith.”

The sad look in Shiro’s eyes faded to understanding and determination. “Yes. If I can help you, let me know.”

Lance frowned, thinking about it. “Well, obviously be supportive when he starts to realize Zarkon’s full of shit. You might want to get with Hunk about that.”

Shiro nodded. “And if there’s anything I can do for you?”

”Don’t worry about me.”

That made Shiro’s eyes narrow. “Lance.”

”I’m fine. I mean it.”

”You can’t put aside your feelings-”

”I can when a teammate’s fucked up like this. _You_ , on the other hand, need to go to bed. You keep staying up late training. When was the last time you slept?”

Shiro frowned. “Lance, this has nothing-”

”If you’re going to get on me for taking care of myself, I’m getting on you.”

Finally, Shiro sighed. “If I go sleep, will you at least talk to Hunk about how this is making you feel?”

”Shiro, I told you-”

”Lance.” His tone brooked no argument.

That made Lance look away. “Fine,” he grumbled. “I’ll talk to Hunk.”

”Thank you.” The relief was great enough in Shiro’s voice that he looked back at him.

”Now go sleep.” Lance waved his hands at him. “Shoo.”

Shiro laughed a little at that, walking past him to go to his room. Lance kept himself from flinching as he did, then looked up at the ceiling.

Damn it.

”I love you Shiro, I really do,” he whispered at the ceiling. “But you are dense as hell sometimes.”

Like Hell he was talking to Hunk about this. Last time had almost devastated Hunk.

He was doing this alone. He could do it alone.

* * *

Keith’s clothes were balled up in the corner. Okay then. At least he was still wearing the tights... things.

Lance just sighed, about ready to leave as he put down the plate of food. But then, something occurred to him. “Hey, Keith.”

”What.”

”So, there was this guy back in flight school. Kinda really ran his mouth about sleeping with you. Was he right?”

Keith looked over at him, the faint red tinge to his cheeks and furious glare telling him more than words.

”Cool, so I’m right in knowing you’re not a virgin. So that means you know what sex feels like.”

”Where are you going with this?”

”Well... why did you let Zarkon hurt you? It didn’t have to hurt. You knew that.”

Keith froze, and looked away. “He... was too big.”

”Man, you haven’t heard some of the stories I have about the things people shove in their asses. Some are pretty huge. Enough lube and prep and you can stick about anything up there without it tearing.” Keith didn’t answer, the hand across his knee just flexing. “He didn’t have to hurt you. Why did he?”

Keith didn’t answer.”

Lance waited for a moment, then looked down at the food. “I’ll leave you to eat.”

When the door closed behind him, Lance felt like heaving.

He didn’t think he’d ever have to hear that question again.


	25. Chapter 25

Lance had no idea what he was talking about. He had no idea. He wasn’t there. He didn’t know the kind of things that happened. He didn’t-

Keith tried to slow his breathing as he realized how hard, how fast it was scraping his throat. Lance had no idea. He had- he had abandoned him, right? Keith’s eyes fell on the empty plate of food, on the unused silverware, on the pile of his clothing. Why was he treating him this way? They were- they were just waiting to kill him, to finish the job, right?

A little part of his brain said they were trying to help him. That he did know them, and this was what they did.

He couldn’t shut that part of his brain up.

Zarkon was _huge._ He didn’t even fit in his mouth. Of course it would hurt. And it didn’t matter anyway. He was his pet. His consent didn’t...

Keith swallowed.

Lance had no idea.

To survive, he had become a pet. He had to.

His hand touched the collar around his neck. They had to know that. They had to see the collar. The tights. They had to know he was just a pet. Just a...

Keith shook his head.

They needed to stop caring about him. He was a _pet_. He needed to go be a pet again. They needed to stop!

And that made Keith freeze, his breath caught in his throat.

Stop... caring about him. They... they weren’t, were they? They... he...

He needed to yell at Lance. To tell him this. Stop caring about him. Stop lying to him. He knew they didn’t actually care. He knew this. So he should stop caring about him.

But it wasn’t time for Lance to show up. Though sometimes he just... showed up. Talked to him for no reason. Even Zornia wouldn’t just show up and talk to him. She would... bring him food personally after that moment. Try to stay as long as she could. But even if she was personally assigned to him, she was a servant, and she was needed elsewhere. Here, Lance would just... come by. For no reason.

And he would leave Keith with all these thoughts. These ideas that... that he didn’t know anything about the situation at all.

No, he knew. Lance didn’t. He hadn’t been there.

He hadn’t had to become a pet to live.

He needed to see Lance and yell at him. Tell him this.

Keith waited. Lance would be by soon enough.

* * *

”You didn’t have to survive.”

”I took one step in this room,” Lance complained. “One step. Can I at least say hello?”

Keith just glared at him. “You have no idea what I had to go through to survive.”

”And yet you keep not telling me. Seriously, I can’t _get_ an idea unless you tell me.”

Silence fell between them. Finally, Keith closed his eyes. “You just... don’t. When you’re told you’d basically be tortured and raped to death within a day of Zarkon leaving, you do things to stay alive. You’d do anything.”

”Yeah.” Lance’s soft, distant voice made Keith open his eyes again, look up at him with surprise. “I get that.”

”No, you don’t,” Keith snapped out. “You don’t understand having to survive. You don’t understand-” He broke off, touching his throat.

”What is that thing, anyway? Didn’t take you for one for chokers.”

”It’s a collar,” he hissed, the words forced out. When Lance didn’t react, he grit his teeth. “Like a _pet._ ”

The last word made Lance twitch. Good. But when Lance didn’t react more than that, Keith frowned. He just told him that he was Zarkon’s pet. Shouldn’t that have at least gotten... disbelief?

”Why didn’t you say that before?” Lance finally asked, his voice... weird. “You had a chance before to tell me that.”

”Why aren’t you yelling at me?” Keith shot back. “I just told you I’m Zarkon’s pet!”

”Because I want to know why you didn’t say it when you first could. I mean, you told me you had to do thing to survive. You could have told me like the first time we talked that you were a pet. Why didn’t you?”

Keith looked away. He... didn’t know. He just couldn’t say the words then.

”If you are his pet, he takes really shitty care of his pets. You’d think he’d treat you awesome.”

Keith didn’t answer. He had been treated well.

”I mean, your bones hadn’t really healed right, he hurt you while having sex... there’s probably more I don’t know about.”

”Shut up,” Keith hissed.

Lance held his hands up. “Just saying.”

”You don’t understand anything. You’ve never had to be in that kind of situation.”

”Understand that this guy is telling you things that you know can’t be true, but appears like they are? Understand that he appears to be all you’ve got? Understand that everyone else is against you, that you’re alone except for him?”

That hit a little too close.

”Understand that you have to do certain things or else he’ll be violent towards you, so you better be good and do what he says?”

”Shut up.”

”Understand you don’t matter?”

”SHUT UP!” Keith was on his feet before he knew it, breath heaving in his chest.

Lance was just looking at him, something hidden under his gaze. “Maybe I don’t. Maybe I need you to tell me.”

Keith just glared at him, his hands balling into fists and shaking at his sides. Lance couldn’t understand what he just said. He couldn’t understand that everything just... right. But not. It sounded wrong when he said it.

”I don’t matter,” he whispered. “I’m a pet. My thoughts don’t matter. My consent doesn’t matter.”

”You know they call that rape, right?”

Keith growled at him.

Lance sighed. "Hunk's probably going to make dinner soon. It's my turn to help him. I'll bring you some once we're done."

Keith didn’t acknowledge Lance as he left. He didn’t-

Fuck.

His hands came up, slapped across his ears in a vain hope to keep Lance’s words from echoing in his head. The words ‘they call that rape’ from rising again and again, until it was all he could think.

They call that rape.

Keith’s eyes closed tightly.

Fuck.


	26. Chapter 26

He tried so, so hard, but Hunk knew from experience that Lance was hiding something. The smile didn’t come quite to his eyes, and he talked too fast. No one else would see it, probably. But it stood out clear as day to Hunk.

Lance chatted away about something that he didn’t pay attention to, knife expertly cutting up something that looked like a wooden celery as Hunk thought. It was always great when he had Lance in the kitchen because for one, Lance was a great person. And two, Lance knew what he was doing. His mom made sure of that.

But right now, Hunk could see Lance hiding something, and he had a feeling he knew what it was.

He didn’t blame Lance. Keith’s situation... he never wanted to see it again either. And he hadn’t even been the one in the middle of it. But Lance was trying to take this all on alone, and it was hurting him. Hunk sighed, interrupting Lance’s talk as he reached over, plucking the knife from his grip and crossed his arms, putting on a stern face. “You’re hiding something.”

”Hunk, man, I’m not hiding anything,” Lance said with a laugh. He spread his arms, smiling. “Honest.”

With a shake of his head, Hunk told him, “I can tell you’re hiding something. And even if I couldn’t- Lance, man, you’re taking Keith on all by yourself?”

That flipped a switch in Lance. He looked away, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “So what? You know it’s something I can do.”

”Yeah, but not alone.” Hunk put down the knife. “After what happened-”

”And that’s why I have to do it,” Lance interrupted. “Because it happened. Because you can’t do it again. Because _I_ have to do it. Okay?”

”You don’t have anything to make up for,” Hunk told him gently. “You don’t have to do this because you think you have to redeem yourself or something.”

Lance snorted, but didn’t answer.

”It wasn’t-”

” _I know._ ” The stressed words came out around gritted teeth. “I just can’t let you do it, okay? I can’t let you go through it again.”

”And instead let you go through it alone? Man, I can’t watch you break down like this.” Lance fell quiet, and Hunk pushed on, hoping he was getting through. “At least talk to me about this. You’re having to talk about it all over again and-”

”Yeah. I know.” Lance’s voice was almost inaudible.

”Come on, Lance.”

Shaking his head, Lance reached over and picked up the knife again, going back to cutting. “I can’t,” he finally said, his voice firm. “Because I can’t do that to you again. And,” he added as Hunk opened his mouth, “because I need to keep myself together. I need to be there for _Keith._ Can’t be breaking the fuck down before we get him back.”

”Let me help.”

Lance sighed, finishing cutting and putting the knife aside. “You really want to?”

”Yeah!”

”Fine.” Lance pointed to the boiling pot. “You take dinner to him. I’m warning you, though, he’s a nasty piece of work right now. He had to become Zarkon’s _pet_ to survive.

That made Hunk quiet. Pet.

”So yeah. Good luck.”

”Thanks,” he said quietly, turning back to the food, the word ‘pet’ bouncing around in his head.

Poor Keith.

* * *

Keith didn’t say anything as Hunk came in, just lifted his head in surprise. Hunk laughed a little, self-consciously, and put down the tray. “Hey,” he said, scratching the back of his head. “Haven’t managed to see you yet.”

”Are you going to say the same things?” Keith asked bluntly. “Go on about how Zarkon was bad for me, how I was fucking _raped?_ ”

Whoo boy. Hunk sat down, his legs crossed in front of him. “Were you?”

Keith just looked away.

”If you weren’t, why do you think you were?”

”Lance,” he hissed. “He said since my consent didn’t matter, that was called rape.”

Hunk swallowed. Yeah, that was rape. “If it wasn’t, would it still be sticking with you?”

Keith pulled up one knee, laying one arm across it.

”I mean... you’d know if Lance was wrong, right?”

”Shut up,” he growled.

Please be working. “Is he wrong?”

”Shut up!”

”Keith...” Hunk’s voice turned firm here. “Is. He. Wrong?”

Keith didn’t answer for a long time. Finally, he looked down, and whispered, “No.”

His pulse pounded in his ears as he heard Keith say that one word. Hunk didn’t say anything else, just let Keith heard that word hang in the air.

”No,” Keith said again, brokenly. “He’s not wrong.”

Hunk didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to stop Keith, to dam this up.

”He’s... but I’m a _pet._ It... it doesn’t matter if Zarkon rapes me. I’m...” Keith froze, his eyes wide as he realized what he just said. “Oh fucking _hell_.” His voice broke on the last word, and he started to cry, curling up.

Slowly, Hunk shifted forward, reaching out for Keith. He completely expected it when Keith pushed him away, his face a mask of grief and disbelief. Instead, he sat there, being another presence in the room for him.

Being there for him, just as he had been there for another before.


	27. Chapter 27

Raped.

He said it with his own mouth.

He had been raped.

Zarkon had raped him.

But he was a pet. He-

Keith clenched his eyes tightly. He had done it to survive. Didn’t that make it okay? As long as he was alive? He had to live. Without thinking, his hands slapped themselves over his stomach, over the scar made when they gutted him. They could have done that again, and this time let him die from it. He had gone with Zarkon to make sure it didn’t happen. He gave Zarkon perfect obedience in...

Lance’s voice came back to him. All the words, hitting him hard, framing them not as a pet but as- What the hell did he know. He... he didn’t know what...

Keith opened his eyes, looking up. Hunk was still sitting there, his face still kind. Gentle. Why was he doing this? Why were Lance and Hunk saying these things?

”He wanted me to give him perfect obedience,” he finally whispered, his voice hoarse.

”Or?”

Keith snorted. “You know. Or I’d be punished.” He paused, hearing the words aloud. Hearing them spoke to Hunk. “Fuck.” The word shook as it hit him, Lance’s words about how he better be good or he’d be violent... “It’s not how it sounds.”

”Then how is it, Keith?”

He couldn’t answer. It just... he couldn’t make it sound _right._

”Hey.” Lance’s voice made him look up, tensing. “Everything okay?”

”Yeah. We’re just talking.”

Lance looked over at Keith, taking in his quiet form. “You okay there, man?”

Keith snorted.

”No, really, you okay? Kinda need to know these things.”

”I shouldn’t listen to you,” he growled. “None of you. You left me to die there. Anything you say doesn’t matter. I had to survive.”

Lance stared at him for a moment, then closed his eyes. “Hunk, can you go get Shiro? He’s got the magic button. And tell Coran we need him in the med bay.” When Hunk stood and left, Lance took his place, curiously serious. “What makes you think I don’t understand your position?”

”It doesn’t matter. You didn’t have to survive.”

Lance just looked at him for a moment. Then, as Shiro came into the room, holding a small rectangle with a button in the middle, he pulled back one sleeve of his jacket, holding his arm up.

The forearm was a mess of scars.

They looked like they had been defensive wounds.

”Come on,” he said, shaking the sleeve back down and standing. “I need to show you something.” Lance looked over at Shiro, nodding. “We need to go to the med bay.”

* * *

He had been right. The cuffs were remote controlled. Shiro had pushed the button when picking it up, and the cuffs had regained their proper form, able to be manipulated so Keith could have his wrists cuffed behind him. And so the three of them walked down the hall to the med bay, Shiro’s Galra hand tight on Keith’s bicep.

What the Hell could Lance want to show him?

Coran was waiting for them. “Lance, I’m not sure what you want for me to do,” he started, eyeing Keith. “These cryopods can only do so much-”

”I need you to access medical history,” Lance interrupted. “Mine. After I got back without Keith.”

Coran nodded, and Keith’s eyes narrowed. He couldn’t be-

The hologram of Lance’s body came up, his ears, brain, and lungs lit up red. “He had burst eardrums, a concussion, and some pulmonary contusion,” Coran narrated, pointing to each area as he spoke. “Most likely from the explosion.”

Keith’s hands flexed.

”Bring up Pidge and Hunk’s.”

”Lance, that is a serious breach of confidentiality. I cannot, in good faith-”

”I need to see it,” Keith growled. “Show me Pidge and Hunk’s scans.”

Coran looked at him for a moment, then nodded, bringing up Pidge and Hunk’s records as well. “Understand I do this with protest!”

Keith ignored him, just staring at all the red. Swallowing as he realized the state all three of them had been in.

”Coran.” Shiro’s hand on his bicep tightened briefly as he spoke up. “Bring up mine.”

Shiro’s wasn’t as impressive.

But it was obvious he had a concussion.

It was also obvious by the timestamp, coded now in Altean and English thanks to Hunk and Pidge, that this scan happened hours after even Hunk and Pidge’s.

Lance hissed. “You were doing all of that with a _concussion_...”

”Not the time.”

Keith just stared at the scans. At the wounds they had incurred.

”Take me back.” He heard his voice from far away, and felt shocked it didn’t shake. “I’ve seen enough.”

No one spoke for a moment, didn’t move, then Shiro started to pull him away, back to the cell. They didn’t talk as they went, and Keith just stood in the cell as the door closed, even as the cuffs deactivated and fell off.

Then he screamed, punching the wall.

Now his hand hurt.

* * *

It had to have been from another time. Another battle. Another-

It all sounded so _hollow._

Of course they could have been far away. Healing. Those were horrible wounds, if they were at the same time as when he was captured. So Zarkon showing him that image could have just been them trying to get back into working order before coming for him.

Fucking...

He....

What could he believe? Did he believe Lance? Or Zarkon?

Lance... the scars stayed with him. What did they mean? He had defended himself against something... someone. What? What had Lance...

He closed his eyes tightly, clenching a fist, leaning back against the wall as he sat.

Then opened them as Lance walked in.

”Where’d they come from?” he growled, not even letting him open his mouth. “Your scars.”

”Oh man.” Lance rubbed the back of his head. “You know, I have mostly impressions of what happened. Like, shattered glass and plates. Dinner _everywhere._ I remember thinking I had to protect my face when I was bent over, so-” He put his arms in front of his head, protective. Keith imagined those arms grinding up against shards of glass, making that cacophony of scars. “Don’t remember how long it took to pick all the glass out of my arms or how many stitches I got. Ask Hunk that.”

Keith looked down, his fist flexing.

”Hey. Keith.” Lance knelt down next to him. “You’re not there anymore, okay? So you don’t have to worry about something like that happening to you. You’re not going to be treated like that again.”

Keith didn’t answer at first.

Then.

”What if I want to go back to Zarkon?” He finally looked up, his face serious. “What if I think that’s all I’m good for now? What if I think I’m just a pet?”

Lance’s face darkened. “Keith... people like Zarkon, they don’t like losing their property. If you go back, he might kill you so no one can have his property at all.”

”And how do you know that?”

”Because.” Lance looked at him. “One of the impressions I have is pain in my throat and not being able to breathe.”

* * *

He wasn’t the Red Paladin. Not anymore. He... he couldn’t be. Red would reject him like this.

But... Keith’s fingers played with the collar. He had to be Zarkon’s pet. He...

No. He didn’t know what he had to be.

Keith closed his eyes, trying to find the answer. What he had done to survive... he had to do it. But now... his eyes snapped open.

”I need to talk to Allura,” he said firmly. Then he stood, waving his arms, hoping to find a camera. “Hey! I need to talk to the Princess!”

After a few minutes of that, he quieted down. If they had seen that, he would either have Allura there soon, or someone else would be there to talk to him. Possibly. Or he would be alone until Lance came.

But it wasn’t long until the door opened, revealing Allura. “You wished to speak with me?” she said, her voice calm and even.

Keith swallowed. Now that she was here, what did he say? He thought she was lying to them about Voltron. Finally, he lifted his chin. “Are you lying to us?”

Allura blinked, taken off guard. “What?”

”About Voltron! About everything! Are you lying to us?”

”No!” Allura took a deep breath, visibly calming herself. “No, Keith. It’s been ten thousand years, and I may not know everything that has changed, but I swear to you, I am telling you the truth about what I know.”

Keith stared at her, trying to read her. “Did you know what we were signing up for when we became Paladins of Voltron?”

Allura’s face crumpled a little. “I had an inkling,” she confessed. “A thought that you would be sorely needed in this universe. I hadn’t realized how much time had passed, and how far the Galra influence had spread. I hadn’t realized how badly you were needed.”

He couldn’t _tell_. Even if he was still a Paladin of Voltron, he couldn’t promise to follow her again. He just couldn’t _tell_ if she was telling the truth.

”If you do not wish to be the Red Paladin,” Allura said quietly, making him jump, “I can pilot the Red Lion in the interim. Once we find a suitable Red Paladin, I will step down. I will not force you to pilot if you cannot trust in me.”

Keith just stared at her until she left. Finally, he looked down at his hands, gritting his teeth.

She wasn’t expecting perfect obedience out of him.

She wasn’t forcing him back into the Red Paladin role.

* * *

It was a little surprising when Shiro opened the door. Keith turned around, crossing his arms. “What.”

”I can’t want to see you?” Shiro asked, rubbing the back of his head. “I just wanted to see how you’re doing.”

Keith nodded, crossing his arms. “Could use a bath or something,” he muttered.

That made Shiro’s face light up. “That, I can give you. In a team building exercise, Allura showed us a communal bathing area. It’s very similar to Japanese bathing pools, meant for many people and mingling. Apparently many races preferred to talk and negotiate while soaking in a pool. I think she meant for us to relax and talk, not to try to drown each other.” He laughed a little, and Keith imagined Lance, Pidge, and Hunk around water. And then realized Lance probably kept his distance, or had some kind of long shirt on the entire time. He looked over at Shiro, who shook his head. “I’ll have to cuff you,” he said, apologetically. “Is that okay?”

Keith just obediently put out his hands, making Shiro wince. But he activated the cuffs and slipped them around his wrists, guiding him out of the cell and down the hall.

The place he took Keith to first wasn’t full of pools, but a tiled area with benches, buckets, and faucets. But this was obvious. When Shiro took the cuffs off, Keith just started taking off the tights.

”Do you-” Keith looked over at him, looking at the blush crawling over Shiro’s face at the lack of modesty Keith now showed. “Do you need me to clean these?”

Keith just shrugged. He tossed them over a nearby screen and went over to a faucet, turning it on.

Cleaning was pretty simple. After he dumped the last bucket of water over his head, he went over to the screen. Then stopped.

The tights were still there. But they had been joined by a folded pile of clothes. His clothes, with the jacket and gloves.

”If you want to rest in the pools, we can go out there,” Shiro called to him from right outside the door.

”No. I’m fine,” he said distractedly.

Then, he reached out.

When he came out, he tugged absently on his gloves. They didn’t fit right.

Shiro looked him up and down, smiling at familiar clothes. At him not wearing tights. “Welcome back,” he whispered.

Keith just looked away.

He wasn’t the Red Paladin. He wasn’t anything.

Not even a pet.

"Yeah."


	28. Chapter 28

”Take me back.”

Keith didn’t look up at Shiro. Didn’t look into his room. That was the room of the Red Paladin. Not his room. Not anymore.

”Keith, I’m not going to-”

”Take me back,” he growled. His gloves felt strange on his skin as his hands flexed. “Now.”

”I’m not going to treat you like a _prisoner,_ ” Shiro told him fiercely. “Not when you’ve started to see yourself again. I’m not going to lock you up and-”

”I’m not the Red Paladin,” Keith shot back, biting the words out. Shiro’s spine locked straight as Keith glared at him. “I’m not the Red Paladin,” he repeated, his voice low and hissing. “I gave that right up when I let Zarkon make me a pet. I don’t deserve that room.”

Shiro stared at him for a moment, then reached out before biting his lip, hand hovering between them. “You’re a human being,” he finally said, dropping his hand. “It’s not about being part of Voltron.”

”And what if I was pretending?” Keith said, sharp and hard. “What if I just put on the clothes to make you think I was seeing your way and wanted to kill you later?”

”Because I know you,” Shiro told him, voice firm and serious. “And I know you’re not going to hurt us. What you had to do... we all do things we don’t want to do to survive.” His voice trailed off, leaving room for memories. The remembrance of Shiro fighting for his life, for the amusement of others. “And I know what it does to you. But I also know you won’t hurt us. You...” Shiro sighed. “Keith, you had to believe a lot of things to survive. But I can see you now. I know we have you back.”

Keith looked away.

”Take me back.”

Shiro didn’t answer, didn’t move for a moment.

Then his human hand wrapped around Keith’s bicep, gently pulling him away from the door.

”You don’t have to atone for anything,” Shiro told him as he led him down the halls. “You did what you had to in order to survive.”

”I know,” he whispered. “That’s why I have to be back there.”

Shiro’s hand tightened briefly. He knew he’d get it. The feeling of not quite trusting the situation he was in, not quite trusting himself yet. Not trusting anything, not even himself, was safe. “Do you need anything?” he asked instead as they turned the final corner.

Keith shook his head. “I’m good.”

Shiro didn’t respond to that, only opened the cell for Keith to enter. “You know we all love you, right?” he told him, not yet closing the door.

”Yeah.”

Keith looked over at Shiro, and nodded.

And the door closed.

* * *

Lance... strangely, didn’t want to talk about it. At least, for him. It was all about Keith.

Which made Keith squint at him as Lance sat there, leaning in. “So when are we going to talk about the fact you’ve been in a situation like mine?” Keith finally asked abruptly, making Lance jolt. “I can’t exactly say you’re lying because you can’t get those scars fighting as the Blue Paladin. They’re where the vambraces would be. So you were forced to submit or else. Why aren’t you talking about that?”

”Because I don’t want to,” Lance told him, voice heated. “Because that’s better left unsaid. And because this is about _you._ It’s about getting your head out of Zarkon’s hold and making you think for yourself again. Hate me, that’s fine. Hate me for _your_ reasons, not Zarkon’s. I’m not here for me. I’m here for _you._ ”

Keith let the back of his head hit the wall. “You dumbass.”

”As long as that’s not Zarkon speaking!”

Keith glared at him as Lance gave him a thumbs up.

After a bit, Lance sighed, setting his arms on his legs. “Keith. It’s that... you won’t leave the cell. I mean, I get you’re not the Red Paladin. I’m going to miss our stupid bets, but I can’t force you to be a Paladin. Just... this isn’t your fault.”

Keith swallowed.

”Yeah, party line and all, but I had to hear it too. It isn’t. You don’t have to punish yourself like it is. You can come out, talk to us, sleep in your own room... and not everyone here’s a Paladin anyway. You’ll be in good company.”

”You mean with Allura.”

Lance blinked at Keith’s flat tone. “And Coran. Why, something wrong with the Princess?”

Keith looked away. How could he tell him that Zarkon had twisted him up so much he couldn’t tell if Allura was lying to them? That he couldn’t, in good faith, follow her again?

”Hey.” Keith didn’t look over at Lance when the other spoke up. “Whatever Zarkon said... it was to make you more dependant on him. It wasn’t true.”

”What if you can’t tell that?” Keith spat out. “What if, no matter how hard you try, you can’t tell what the truth is?”

”You find out.” Lance’s voice was so serious Keith finally turned his head. “Seriously, you think I didn’t live that already? You keep digging. You find out what the truth is. And trust me, a little digging and you’ll see that Zarkon’s full of shit. It passes first inspection, but whoo buddy let me tell you what you find when you actually look.”

Keith closed his eyes.

”Do you think Allura’s lying to us?” he finally asked, not opening them. Not wanting to look at Lance as he asked.

Lance didn’t answer for a moment. “No,” he said, firmly. “I think everything she’s said is the truth.”

Slowly, Keith opened his eyes, not yet looking at Lance. “I still can’t trust her,” he admitted. “I think I should, maybe, but I just... can’t.”

”Keith...” He finally looked up at his name, seeing Lance’s eyes on his face, serious. “Is that why you can’t be a Paladin anymore?”

The words hit him. They were... He took a deep breath, nodding. “It’s part of the reason,” he said as Lance sat back. “It’s... I can’t be the Red Paladin. I don’t des-”

”You finish that sentence and I will punch you,” Lance interrupted, his voice deadly serious. “Don’t you _fucking_ say you don’t deserve it. You deserve it. The question is, do you want it?”

Keith blinked.

Did he?

”I-”

Lance stood. “Come on. Come with me for a walk. My ass is going numb.”

Keith sighed, looking up at the ceiling. But he stood as well, absently straightening his jacket as they left the cell. Did he want to be the Red Paladin? It had been everything to him... he had belonged... but he didn’t-

No. Keith flexed his hands. What did he know what he deserved? He had let himself become a pet. One hand came up, touching the collar he still didn’t know why he didn’t take off.

Suddenly, the floor shook under him, and they looked around as the alarm started. Keith’s pulse rose, anticipating a battle. Anticipating getting into Red, getting-

No. He wasn’t the Red Paladin.

”Shit!” Lance looked over at him, eyes wide. “You might not be able to trust her, but you’re going to be safest on the bridge anyway. Go to Allura! Maybe you’ll work out your differences!” With those words, he ran off to change into his flight suit and armor, leaving Keith alone.

Leaving Keith to look down at his hands.

If they were Galra...

The thought stayed with him all the way to the bridge. All it took was one look at the screen to see they were.

And the ship behind them. The one he recognized from when he fought Zarkon alone.

His hand touched the collar on his neck.

Without a word, he turned and ran for the escape pods. He needed to- he- talk. Ask Zarkon questions. See his responses. Spit in his eyes if he had to. Just. Go.

He had to go.


	29. Chapter 29

Fuck, this was such a bad idea. Keith knew they had to see him flying towards Zarkon’s ship in the middle of all of this. But as long as he got there first, as long as he could get to Zarkon, hear him out, it wouldn’t matter. He’d go back calmly once that happened.

If... if he wanted to. Keith’s hands clenched on the controls. No matter what Zarkon had done, at the core he had _saved_ him. And a part of him felt he owed Zarkon something for that.

Keith shook his head, and narrowed his focus to flying. He had to make it through the battleground first. To weaving and dodging- damn it! He missed Red. But he could see Red leaving the Castle now, Allura apparently had enough and joining the battle. Or maybe they needed her. Maybe they could form Voltron without him.

But maybe not.

He didn’t know. With everything Allura said in the past, it seemed like she couldn’t form Voltron with them. But she lied- or did she lie? Fuck... he didn’t know. Maybe she could and she didn’t know yet. They had just gotten Red back.

Keith grit his teeth. Ignore them. Get to the ship. Get to Zarkon.

When he got there, he couldn’t get out of the pod fast enough, couldn’t scramble into the ship soon enough. It felt wrong, entering a Galra vessel wearing so many clothes, but... if he stayed, he’d do it right. Keith’s fingers came up, stroking his collar. He’d wear the right clothes if he stayed. Right now, he didn’t know.

The very first thing he did once he rounded a corner was run into a yelling Galra commander’s chest. Before he could do more than tense, he was picked up by the collar of his jacket, yellow eyes glaring into him. “You,” the commander hissed. “The Emperor’s wayward _pet_.”

”That’s me,” Keith said, his voice even.

The commander stared at him for a moment longer, then laughed. “The Emperor never has to know you were ever here,” he said, his hand going to his side.

”He is already aware he’s here.”

Keith swallowed at Zornia’s voice. Slowly, he was put down, the commander stepping back. She didn’t even acknowledge the commander, turning to Keith, her lips turning down at the clothing. “What happened to you, kitten?” she muttered, fussing with his hair.

”I-”

”If you’re going to take him to Emperor Zarkon, do so already,” the commander snapped at her. “Fucking women.”

She hissed at him. “Go pretend to lead something.” Keith snorted as the commander growled, Zornia ignoring that as she continued fussing over Keith. “Come on, kit,” she told him, pulling him away. “We need to go.”

”See Zarkon.”

She bit her lip, stopping. “We shouldn’t. He... he’s never in a good mood when Voltron’s so close. I don’t want you hurt, kit. It’ll be okay. I’ll take you back to my quarters.”

Keith shook his head. “I need to see him. Now.”

Zornia stroked his head. “Kitten, are you sure?”

He nodded.

After a moment, Zornia sighed and started down a familiar corridor. “I’ll stay with you,” she told him. “Kitten, were you at least treated well while you were stolen away?”

Keith hesitated. He didn’t want to tell her... what they had said. How he was starting to doubt. But the silence was enough for her ears to droop and her head to shake.

Then her hand came back, mindful of her claws as she squeezed his hand as they walked.

But... what would he say when he got there? Would he even need to say anything? Keith squeezed her hand back. He felt so twisted up. Lance’s voice bounced in his head as they walked, and he inhaled sharply as they entered the bridge of Zarkon’s ship.

Zarkon turned at the sound of them, breaking off in mid-sentence as he caught sight of Keith. His lips fell into a disapproving frown, and he nodded at the commander he was talking to. “My apologizes. My pet apparently doesn’t know when not to bother me. Woman, take him away.”

Zornia started to turn, to lead him away, but Keith took a step forward. “I need to talk to you,” Keith said firmly.

That made a dark cloud cross Zarkon’s face. “Pet,” he hissed at him. “I will only say this one more time. Leave until I ask for you.”

A part of him said to obey. He gave Zarkon perfect obedience. That was the rule.

Keith took another step forward.

Zarkon casually backhanded him. “One moment,” he heard Zarkon say. “I will need to discipline my pet.” Keith started to look back at him, only for Zarkon’s clawed hand to seize his hair, ruthlessly shoving his head back to bare his throat. “You know better than this,” he told Keith, disappointed.

... why was he letting Zarkon hurt him?

The thought suddenly filled his brain, crystal clear. Why was he letting Zarkon hurt him? Keith glared at him, hands clenching at his sides.

Zarkon’s eyes narrowed.

”Have they been filling your head with nonsense, pet?”

”I’m... not... your... pet.”

The words were so hard to say. He had believed it so hard. But when Zarkon released him, Keith stumbled away, ripping the collar off his throat and chucking it at him. Zarkon caught it on reflex, unamused. “I’m not your fucking pet,” he said again, hands shaking. “I’m not going to let you hurt me again.”

Zarkon looked down at the collar in his hands, sighing. “I see. Well, you know what happens to bad pets.” He turned to the commander. “Put him down.”

Oh fuck. He didn’t think this through. He didn’t have a weapon. And the commander had one of those swords it seemed like all the commanders had, and was drawing it. Keith took a step backwards, shifting his body. Maybe he could disarm him.

And then-

Zornia’s claws flashed out, digging into the commander’s throat. He hadn’t even seen her move. There was a snarl on her face as she ripped the commander’s throat out, blood flying through the air. “Don’t touch my kitten,” she panted.

Zarkon only stared at them, hands behind his back. “Hm. I had heard of mothers doing amazing things for their kittens before. I knew I should have taken your head long before you two bonded.”

Before Keith could say anything, Zornia grabbed his hand, yanking him as she ran out of the room. As they left, he could the alarm start up, and the sound of guards stomp through the halls.

And even still, Zornia yanked him through the halls, her blood covered hand covering his. He could hear her whispering under her breath, and he was pretty certain he heard ‘what the fuck did I just do’ a few times. Finally, she pulled him into a side hallway, pressing her back into the wall as guard droids passed by. “Damn it,” she whispered. “Kitten, how did you get here?”

”Escape pod,” he whispered back.

She nodded. “I know where you can get one of ours. When you get there, run. Go. Anywhere. Away from here. Survive.”

”Come with me.”

Zornia’s ears rose in surprise. “I- I can’t. I’m just-”

”They’ll kill you. Come with me, Zornia.”

She looked down at their joined hands. Slowly, she nodded. When Keith smiled, she placed a bloody finger over his lips. “We need to get out of here first,” she told him fiercely. “Come.”

”We need a weapon,” he told her.

Zornia shook her head. “There’s no time. I can hear when there’s guards coming.”

Keith closed his eyes, but nodded. He opened his eyes as Zornia let go of his hand, following her out and down the hall. When he heard the metallic stomp of feet, he tensed, ready to stop, but she continued on, pulling him around the corner just in time.

And then she hissed, coming to a stop. “I hear someone fighting.”

”Can’t we go around? Or-” He looked around, trying to find a weapon.

”No. Not now.” Zornia growled, her hands flexing. “Don’t worry. I’ll protect you.”

”I should be saying that,” he told her.

Zornia smiled a little. “Just stay behind me.”

As the crept closer, Keith heard the sound she had heard... and his heart picked up. He reached out, grabbing her hand. “Wait,” he told her. “Let me.”

”Kitten.”

He squeezed her hand, and pushed past her. If he was right, that was a Paladin. If he was right, that was...

He was right.

Shiro threw a guard droid past them, his arm glowing purple. Keith could hear Zornia hissing behind him, and he held an arm out, both to shield her from the now wary Shiro and to keep her from attacking him.

”Champion,” she hissed, grabbing Keith’s arm and trying to push it out of the way.

Shiro, to his credit, didn’t ask why Keith was there. He just watched them, his arm still glowing purple. Just waited to see what they would do.

”We need to get out of here,” Keith told him, his voice low and intense. “Both of us. The Lions can fit the three of us.”

”Kitten, you can’t mean-!”

”She’s Galra, Keith,” Shiro told him, his voice warning.

”She just killed a commander to save my life.”

Shiro looked over at Zornia, blinking as he took in her dress. Finally, the glow of his arm faded and he lowered it. “We can’t keep her with the rest of us,” he told Keith.

”Just get us out of here,” he told him, lowering his hand to grip Zornia’s. “We’ll... we’ll be out of your hair then.”

That made pain cross Shiro’s face, half hidden by his helmet. “Keith...”

”Shiro. Please.”

Finally, Shiro nodded. “Follow me.”

Zornia pulled Keith back slightly, leaning into whisper in his ear. “Is this the wisest idea, kitten? This is the Champion.”

Keith looked over at the waiting Shiro. “Yeah,” he told her quietly. “He’ll at least get us out of here safely.”

Zornia squeezed his hand as he started forward.

Then Keith was half yanked back before her grip was broken.

When he spun around, a tall soldier was holding Zornia by the throat outside the open door. “A traitor, the Emperor’s pet, and the Champion.” He shook Zornia, making her choke. “I’m going to enjoy this. I’ll take your bodies back to the Emperor, get the promotion I-”

Zornia’s claws reached behind her, scratching his eyes. He let her go, and she scrambled for the door before a hand closed on one ear, pulling her back. She stumbled back as Keith rushed forward, then slammed her hand on something by the wall, the door starting to close as soon as she did.

”Run, kitten!”

The door slammed shut as soon as Keith got to it.

”Damn it!” Keith slammed his hand on the door, trying to pry it open. “Shiro, you have a Galra hand! Open-!”

Even through the door, he could hear the feminine gurgling gasp, and the too meaty thud of a body falling.

Shiro grabbed his arm as he stepped back, numb. “Come on!”

Keith let him pull him through the halls, to the Black Lion. To the Castle of Lions.

Away.

From it all.


	30. Chapter 30

A blanket settled around Keith, pulling him out of his numb thoughtlessness for a moment. He looked up at Shiro, tracking him as he sat next to him. They had all managed to built a rec room before Keith had been caught, and Shiro had settled him in there once they returned. And he didn’t leave him, just reached over and squeezed his knee.

In return, Keith couldn’t speak. Couldn’t... couldn’t think. He didn’t want to. Every time the fog barely lifted, he heard that gasp, that thud- he shuddered, pulling the blanket closer in.

”Are you going to be okay?” Shiro murmured, the words muffled in his ears.

”Y-” No, that was a lie, wasn’t it. Keith closed his eyes, shaking his head.

”Do you want to talk about it?”

”No.” He heard the word snapped out, and he couldn’t stop it.

Shiro slowly removed his hand from his knee, and he expected Shiro to leave him alone. But he never did, just sat there with him.

Just stayed there with him as he heard Zornia’s gasp and her body fall to the ground over and over in his mind.

If he hadn’t gone back, Zornia would still be alive. She would still be well. But he had to go back for some stupid reason. Damn it, Lance had even warned him that Zarkon would want to kill him. Why didn’t he listen? He knew Lance knew what he was talking about and he still didn’t listen.

Keith clutched the blanket tighter, gritting his teeth.

Zarkon needed to pay. It was personal now.

But how? How the hell was he going to do this? He wasn’t the Red Paladin anymore...

Unless...

No.

He _wasn’t the Red Paladin._ No matter what, he wasn’t going to be the Red Paladin anymore. He needed to stop thinking about that.

”Do you need anything?”

That was Shiro again. Keith shook his head. No. He didn’t need anything.

Just Zornia back.

* * *

At least Keith was allowed a weapon. Not the Red Bayard, but they could find him a sword to practice with in the training room. That was enough. It felt... a lot like they were treating him as a person. After everything that happened with Zarkon, it felt nice. Strange.

He didn’t want to tell anyone that he couldn’t even beat the levels he used to anymore. With what happened... he couldn’t focus. If he had been better, if he had been faster- but he hadn’t. And it leaked into his fighting, the frustration. The anger. The self-hatred.

If he had just saved her, if he hadn’t _gone back-_

”End simulation,” Keith said roughly.

He knew he was avoiding everyone. But he had to. He couldn’t look at them after that.

His actions had been the ones to kill Zornia. To kill the mother he had just gained.

Keith screamed.

* * *

”You’ve got to quit moping.”

Keith glared at Lance with his spoon halfway to his mouth. “I came down here specifically when no one else would be here.”

Lance shrugged, coming into the dining room from the doorway to sit next to him. “I figured that. Dude. I am seriously not kidding.”

”You don’t know what happened,” he ground out.

”Do you want me to say I do in the way that I understand why because I went back too, or I do because Shiro’s been vague about it but I kinda get something happened to someone while you were there.”

Keith closed his eyes. “Yeah, something happened.” He opened his eyes, glaring at Lance. “Have you ever gotten anyone killed?”

Lance looked away, shaking his head.

”Have you ever had anyone that thinks of you as their child sacrifice their life for you?”

Lance shook his head again.

Keith settled back, looking at his plate of goo. “She was Galra,” he said to the plate. “The first Galra to care about me in that place. She started to care once she heard you guys abandoned me.” He looked over at Lance, daring him to say anything.

Lance just turned to him, listening.

”I was her furless kitten,” he snapped at him. “She always tried to do what was best for me, or wish me well. And... when I went back...” Keith swallowed. “I told Zarkon I wasn’t his pet.”

”He didn’t take it well.”

”You know exactly how he took it.” Keith glared at him. “He had a commander with him. Ordered him to take my head. Zornia killed the commander, grabbed me, and ran.”

”So that’s who Zornia was,” Lance muttered to himself, barely loud enough for Keith to hear him.

Keith ignored that. “I got her killed.” He dropped his spoon onto the plate, feeling disgusted with himself. “My selfish actions got her killed.”

”I’m sorry.”

”I bet you are,” he muttered, tilting his head up at the ceiling. “And the worst part?” he continued, raising his voice again so Lance could properly hear it. “Zarkon still needs to pay for what he’s done. What he did to me. But-”

”But?” Lance said, encouragingly.

”I’m not the Red Paladin,” Keith snapped. “How the Hell am I supposed to make him pay?”

”Well... what’s stopping you from being the Red Paladin again?”

Keith laughed bitterly. “Zarkon told me things about Allura that I can’t prove are true or false. I can’t follow her until I know for sure.”

Lance just went silent at that. Then- “What if you become the Red Paladin to find out?”

”What.”

”You don’t know what’s true, right? What if you join us again to find out?”

”What the fuck are you talking about?”

Lance exhaled, frowning. “Well... like, see it from within. You’re seeing it with new eyes now, right? Instead of seeing everything from the outside, be a part of this and hear everything we have to say. What we have to do. And decide for yourself if it’s right. You can leave if you don’t think it is, right? Take Red and go?”

Keith furrowed his brow. “Red won’t-”

”Won’t what?”

”I... did things I’m not proud of. Red won’t accept me.”

”Have you tried?” Lance asked, pointedly. “I did things I wasn’t proud of then too. Blue loves me. Red should still accept you.”

”Red’s not Blue,” Keith snapped.

”Still. Think about it. And like I said, if you really do think it’s wrong, you can always take Red and make sure we can’t form Voltron.”

Lance stood, leaving him alone to think over that. To think of rejoining Voltron just to criticize it from within.

It was a dumb idea. He shouldn’t do it.

But... he wanted to fly Red again. No matter what else happened, Red... he didn’t realize how much he missed her until now. He wanted her back.

... maybe.

Zarkon needed to pay.

But Red might not-

With a sudden movement, Keith stood, almost throwing his plate aside and running towards the hanger. Even if he decided not to be the Red Paladin, he needed to know if he _could_ be. He needed to know if Red would accept him after all of that. He needed-

He needed Red.

He might not be the Red Paladin, or a pet, or- but he could be Red’s pilot. He could be _something._

When he burst into the hanger, no one was there. Not even Pidge. Just the Lions.Keith’s walked over to Red’s hanger, breath caught. She might not accept him. He reached out, expecting a particle barrier. He had given himself over to Zarkon, after all. Over to the enemy. Let himself become a plaything. It would only be right for him to be rejected.

But his fingers kept going.

And he touched metal.

A breath tumbled from his lips as he looked up at Red. That wasn’t proof of anything. She still could-

Suddenly, she opened her mouth. Keith looked up, heart pounding a tattoo against his ribs. He climbed in slowly, not sure what to expect. When she closed her mouth again, all systems booting up, he understood what she was saying.

”Yeah,” he whispered. “Yeah, we can do this alone.” A grin covered his face as he settled into his seat, belting himself in. “I can be your pilot, and not be the Red Paladin. I can do that.”

She purred.

”But don’t you want to be part of this? Part of Voltron?”

He felt something, something... like someone telling him he needed some time. Telling him he needed her. Keith ran his hands over Red’s control sticks, nodding. “Yeah.”

He didn’t need to see what was true from the inside... he needed to see their actions from the outside. And Red... Red would protect him. She always would. Maybe, he’d see they weren’t so bad, and he’d come back. Maybe he wouldn’t.

But right now, the hanger doors opened and he flew out, headed for parts unknown. Headed out to see the truth of the universe for himself, without any influence from Allura or Zarkon.

He wished Zornia could see this with him... but he had the closest thing to her right here. Keith smiled, squeezing one control stick. He had Red back.

And now-

Goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I say I have five ideas in various forms of done, I mean one of them is a possible sequel to this as Keith grows and learns more about himself, Voltron, the Galra empire, and the universe as a whole. But as for right now... the end.
> 
> Thank you all so much! The support for this has been absolutely phenomenal and I am so overwhelmed by it all. Thank you so much. I love you all.
> 
> I have a few thoughts about this on my tumblr here: http://wineturnstowater.tumblr.com/post/153060713557/i-just-finished-the-longest-fic-i-have-probably . Not required reading. Just me rambling.
> 
> Also, there is fanart by whalechief on Tumblr! http://whalechief.tumblr.com/post/152326247358/cause-angels-dont-come-home-by-vagrantbreath I am so honored oh my god. Thank you so much. I have been screaming as loud as I can in an apartment without disturbing my neighbors ever since I saw that.


End file.
